Opinion Sweet Revenge

Rees spoke of the palpable disbelief in the report,which sarcastically said that Bin Laden was “so fortunate” to find many parts of the country’s government,military and intelligence establishment “not doing their job properly”. “The ISI seems to know very little…” And yet he suggested that the ISI is the only institution that matters. “Its chief is so dismissive of politicians,saying… ‘our politicians could be bought with a visa or a dinner.’ The total disrespect for political institutions… lays bare who wields power here.”

Al Jazeera has considerately uploaded this 337 page report so that the invisible people in Arnab Goswami’s back office could download it. Armed with a copy of this patently Pakistani report,and smarting from memories of a time when Islamabad had “rejected a report on Hafiz Saeed saying that it was Indian”,he prepared to exact sweet revenge. Mention of the ISI and Bin Laden have the same effect on the typical Newshour fan as love and grass had at Woodstock,so he would not be thwarted this time. “Please feel free to bring in the interjections right at the start,” he instructed his panelists,in a voice that recalled the age of pistols at dawn.

It was a shambles. Maybe there was a language disadvantage,but the Pakistani side,Col Bashir Wali Mohammed,Former DG of IB,Brig (retd) Javed Hussain,formerly with the Special Forces,and the journalist Qaiser Mehmood didn’t stand a chance against the familiar war-horses on the Indian team: diplomats G Parthasarthy and KC Singh,and the lawyer Mahesh Jethmalani.

The Indians supported the slogan that hung over the screen in a red band: ‘Of course they knew.’ The Pakistanis protested that the picture was complicated,that the country had been in turmoil and that people in power may or may not have known about what Goswami called Bin Laden’s “holiday home in Pakistan.” In response to Parthasarthy’s contention that cantonments are high security areas where nothing moves without the forces’ knowledge,Col Mohammed tried to explain that civilians also lived in them,that highways ran through them,that they were not the great airlocks we imagine them to be,but he lost his way like his compatriots. How could they win when the very report they were discussing went against them,suggesting collusion and conspiracy between the intelligence establishment and terrorists?

The Pakistanis lost gracefully,but they aren’t always like that. A couple of months ago,a video titled ‘Pakistani Reporter Slaps the Snot Out of a Kid’ was a hit on YouTube. The reporter,Najid Bhatti of ARY News Lahore,is signing off at a political meet where some hardline maniac appears to have promised an Islamic jannat in Pakistan. An implausibly short man in a skull cap appears at his shoulder,gazing calmly into the camera. The reporter rambles on helplessly. Emboldened by Shorty’s success in gaining a national viewership,a kid leaps into the frame,right in front of the reporter,who winds up his signature line desperately and clips his ear,knocking him out of the frame. Precisely what Goswami would like to do to all of Pakistan,and almost succeeds now and then.

pratik.kanjilal@expressindia.com