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Is your teenager using foul language? Here’s a guide to help them

Often, teenagers learn best from experience

How can parents help their teens? (Credit: Freepik)

Hearing your teenager use foul language or hurl abuses can be startling for any parent. While the instinct may be to react immediately, this moment provides an opportunity for guidance and deeper connection. Teens may use cuss words for various reasons, including peer influence, as they often mimic friends to fit in or seem “cool”. Sometimes, they resort to swearing when they are overwhelmed and unable to articulate their feelings. Adolescents also test boundaries, pushing limits to gauge reactions, especially if they receive laughter or approval the first time they use expletives. Media exposure, too, plays a significant role, as social media, movies, and music frequently normalise swearing.

Instead of reacting with anger or punishment, take a softer approach. Scolding them may push them towards peers who, in most cases, might not offer the best guidance. A thoughtful adult intervention should be calm and gentle yet firm.

Help your teenager understand what is acceptable in your family by establishing clear rules about language use. Explain why foul language is inappropriate, emphasising respect and the impact of words. Be consistent in enforcing these rules for everyone in the household, including adults, to set a strong example. Use positive reinforcement to encourage respectful communication, conveying the idea that words matter. You might say, “We value kindness and respect in our home, and certain words don’t align with that,” to clarify your expectations while fostering a supportive environment.

Teenagers may not fully grasp how their words can affect others. You can help them understand this by sharing real-life examples of how language shapes social, academic, and professional perceptions, discussing how foul language can escalate conflicts or cause misunderstandings, and encouraging empathy by asking, “How would you feel if someone spoke to you that way?”

Not anger but here’s what can help (Source: Freepik)

Often, teenagers learn best from experience. You may use real moments as teaching opportunities:

– Discuss the consequences calmly if they use inappropriate language in public or at school.

Also Read | Why fathers, too, are caregivers for teenagers

– Encourage them to take responsibility, such as apologising if their words hurt someone.
– Teach them that responding with silence or composure is often more powerful than retaliating with insults.

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The goal isn’t just to stop the cursing, it’s to nurture emotional intelligence and self-expression, essential skills that will serve them well throughout life.