Gulping it down

It was Dad8217;s panacea for a waning appetite, and for us, a childhood ordeal dreaded even more than a caning. Every three months, he would line us up to administer the most foul-tasting purgative ever conjured: raw castor oil. Two large spoonfuls of the undiluted liquid would be thrust down our throats, leaving us grimacing in revulsion. Often we would manoeuvre to be at the end of the queue, hoping Dad8217;s supply of the noxious stuff would run out. But it seldom did. As an emetic, castor oil had no rivals then. Worse, those siblings who threw up were promptly 8212; and forcibly 8212; given another dose. However, a few hours later, there would be proof of the laxative8217;s efficacy: frantic pounding on the toilet door to get the occupant inside to vacate, pronto!

For the skinny among her brood, Mum had a revolting ace up her sleeve: cod liver oil. There were no easy-to-swallow capsules then. So she personally administered a generous spoonful once a day, with one of her beefier sons gleefully pinning down the writhing recipient 8212; usually yours truly. On the other hand, when it came to pleasant-tasting cough syrups and tonics like Waterbury8217;s Compound, Mum was pretty stingy. She doled out meticulously measured spoonfuls 8212; hardly enough to even moisten our throats. We clamoured for more, but the portions remained tiny. In search of other ways to satisfy our taste buds, we would raid a visiting aunt8217;s ample stock of vitamin C tablets whose gloriously sour taste we just could not resist 8212; it was akin to eating raw mangoes. And, with puerile perversity, we preferred to eat 8212; rather than drink 8212; Horlicks and Ovaltine in all their powdery, lip-smacking palatability. Indeed, we relished these energy-boosters in a manner never intended by their makers, leaving Mum wringing her hands in despair.

The constant presence of liquid cures in our lives, tasty or not, was such that our very thoughts were influenced by it. Once our English teacher at school asked for a synonym for 8220;pregnant8221;. 8220;Expectorant!8221; I replied eagerly, having seen the impressive-looking word on a bottle of cough syrup and confusing it with 8220;expectant8221;.