Basanti, MP

ABOUT a quarter century ago, practitioners of Hindi cinema8217;s prodigious gossip industry were going bananas trying to second guess Hema ...

ABOUT a quarter century ago, practitioners of Hindi cinema8217;s prodigious gossip industry were going bananas trying to second guess Hema Malini. Which option would she exercise? Whom would she marry?

Sanjeev Kumar had proposed. Jeetendra had even hired the priest. Hema8217;s mother, a formidable, unsmiling lady known to devoted Stardust readers as the grim 8216;8216;Mrs Chakravarty8217;8217;, reportedly saw cricketer S. Venkataraghavan as prospective son-in-law. In the end, a rough and ready Jat called Dharmendra 8212; social antithesis, as it were, of uptight Tam Brahmism 8212; made up Hema8217;s mind for her.

A stable if shared marriage, two daughters 8212; one the bratty Esha Deol 8212; and half a lifetime later, Hema is decidedly easier to decipher. She8217;s just been nominated to the Rajya Sabha by the BJP-led NDA government, having left nobody in doubt as to her political affiliations. She was with the BJP from day one, as sure as eggs are eggs and Dharamji is Garamji.

Hema, 55, campaigned for the party in the previous Lok Sabha election, happily smiled through a walk-on part in the Narendra Modi roadshow in Gujarat 2003. She wasn8217;t the star but she still had her appeal. K. Chakravarty, the state8217;s director-general of police, gladly went about informing people he was Hema8217;s cousin.

It is no wonder then that Hema8217;s nomination was a near given for months now, even if the other slots were fervently lobbied for or against, amid public outbursts and private phone calls. So Shabana Azmi, Queen of a Thousand Causes, is succeeded by Hema, Empress of a Million Hearts. In an earlier age Nargis and Vyjantimala Bali after two Lok Sabha terms had also done time in the Upper House.

Life wasn8217;t always such a dream. Hema made her debut in an eminently forgettable dud called Sapnon ka Saudagaar, only remembered by trivia buffs as probably Raj Kapoor8217;s worst film. Success arrived with Dev Anand and Johnny Mera Naam 1970, superstardom with Seeta aur Geeta 1972 and immortality as Basanti in Sholay 1975.

Yes, yes, she8217;s also a classical danseuse, has directed a film called Dil Aashna Hai 1991, been a favourite with Gulzar Kinara and Khushboo were among her best films even if hardly anyone remembers them now. Yet, nobody, just nobody is interested in Hema8217;s CV. It8217;s just the whole idea of her as parliamentarian that has everyone wondering.

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So what will Hema do in Parliament? Making sombre speeches in her unreformed south-side Hindi? Go on the mandatory dharna at the Gandhi statue? Frankly nobody knows and fewer care. For most fellow MPs she8217;ll be a good reason to turn up for work; for the rest of us, she8217;ll be a great photo-op. Let8217;s not intellectualise the celebrity cult.

It8217;s a pity they didn8217;t think of sending Dharmendra too to Parliament. In the mid-1980s, there were rumours that he would be offered a Congress nomination from a Jat-dominated constituency in Rajasthan but nothing happened. For those who treat politics for what it is8212;folk theatre8212;the entertainment would have been complete.

Admittedly though Dara Singh, who8217;s also made it to the Rajya Sabha with Hema, is a sort of rough cut version of Dharam, who himself is a sort of rough cut version of 8230; well, let8217;s leave that for another day. This is Hema8217;s moment.