Face-off

quot;I went back to Pune, and decided to take it up.quot; March 1995, he landed in Mumbai and began a successful stint at modelling.

But again, he says, that feeling of emptiness enveloped him8230;

quot;As a sportsman, every minute of my life was goal-oriented, which I missed in modelling,quot; he confesses. Also, he found himself suffering from low self-esteem and was overcome by a feeling of emptiness from a job that didn8217;t really satisfy.

He admits, though, that modelling helped him open up as a person.

quot;I was always very shy, but modelling helped me reach out to people and get a better perspective of the world,quot; he says. Sadly, it simply failed to ignite his passion. quot;There was nothing to look forward to when I woke up every morning.quot;

From there, he went straight to acting.

Having put his modelling career on hold, Bikram says he first attended a part-time management course at NM College, then decided to try his luck at theatre. quot;I realised that acting had become a sort of avenue for expression 8212; something I could put my heart and soul into.quot; His first stage experience came with the English production, Vasavadatta, a period piece. He followed that up with platform performances at Prithvi, Satyadev Dubey8217;s workshops and even a Hindi play for which he observed deaf and dumb patients at a school for the phyrcially challenged.

Once confident, he had acquired the required skills, next stop was Bollywood8230;

quot;I8217;d been grooming myself for months. Then, when I felt I was ready, I went out and began meeting film-makers who I wanted to work with,quot; he says. It was director Karan Johar who put Bikram in touch with film-critic Khalid Mohamed, who at that time was casting for his film Fiza. After being tested for the part, Bikram landed the role of Karisma Kapoor8217;s love interest in the film.

He admits it8217;s not a perfect launch.

quot;No, the film is not about me. I8217;m merely a character with an interesting role,quot; he explains, saying he has to start somewhere. quot;I can8217;t expect to get a role like Amitabh Bachchan8217;s in Deewar for my debut, so I8217;m starting from ground level and taking the stairs up,quot; he says.

The D-Day8217;s is just around the corner and he hasn8217;t seen the film.

He8217;s seen some of the rushes though, and declines to comment on his performance. quot;I8217;m very critical about my own work. Never satisfied.quot; He mentions, however, that he8217;s given his best shot, but the daunting length of the movie resulted in a few of his scenes being chopped off at the editing table quot;I8217;m not complaining, I know it8217;s for the betterment of the filmquot;. Unsure about what to expect, Bikram says he8217;ll be on top of the moon even if the audience reacts positively, and if film-makers show an interest in casting him again.

There8217;s more films on the cards8230;

Film-maker Partho Ghosh has signed him up for Panchi with Manoj Bajpai and Mahima Chaudhary, in which he plays an honest man in dire circumstances. Also, there8217;s a film for Ripples Entertainment. Roshni is about an extra-maritial affair. quot;I8217;m verbally committed to other projects, I8217;m also hearing scripts regularly, but there8217;s nothing else I8217;ve officially signed.quot;

Life outside work, is boring, he claims.

Having stayed away from home for the last ten years now, Bikram currently shacks up at a PG dig in Bandra. quot;I want to buy my own house, but only after I8217;ve established myself as an actor,quot; he says. When he ain8217;t working, he8217;s either watching movies or plays. quot;I8217;ve lots of acquaintainces, but only a few good friends.quot;

Surprise, surprise! He8217;s single, but not quite loving it.

quot;Mumbai is a lonely city. And yes, I would want to have someone with me, but work just takes up all my time,quot; he says sheepishly. Also, he adds, quot;nobody has come along just yet.quot;