A comedy of errors

My brother, a great organizer, used to command troops in action. So after his retirement, he organized his family into a regular labour f...

My brother, a great organizer, used to command troops in action. So after his retirement, he organized his family into a regular labour force with clear-cut duties. He of course, took care of the planning and general supervision. Once, the family decided that their house needed some alterations. The roof from the terrace had to be removed and replaced by a concrete slab. It was decided that the would have to be covered with a roof. So wooden supports and a tin roof was constructed. It served its purpose, as a wall had to be built to support the roof!

Once the strategy was decided upon, forces set to work to do the detailed planning and operation slab8217; was all ready to be launched.

The word slab8217; sent a shiver through my brother and for a week the subject was discussed. It was impressed on all members of the family that they should be alert and watchful. Operation Slab8217; was going to be greater disaster than Y2K or whatever would be hitting the computer world in the new milleneum . I do not know whether my brother made his will, but he seemed convinced that all slabs fell through roofs. Another danger came from an unexpected quarter. The labor force was probably recruited from escaped convicts. Thieves and cut throats could enter houses by asking for drinking water and walk away with the TV, or even kidnap pretty children! The commander gave detailed instructions.Came the d-day. All guests were warned of the impending disaster and advised to postpone their visits. I however, ignored the warning, since I had nothing else on my itinerary. My brother needed a small nap before committing the reserves to battle. All great generals, like Napolean and the Duke of Wellington, observed thisrule. I was sent to my appointed place of duty and warned not to fall asleep, while on sentry duty!

Soon I could hear my brother snoring in D Minor. I saw a few labourers, men and women going past the window but as they did not ask for water, I did not raise an alarm when I could hear some banging on the roof. When my brother woke up, the first question he asked me was, quot;Where are the workers?quot; quot;I do not know. They seem to have disappeared,quot; I said feigning ignorance.

quot;My god! That is the end of the slab! It will soon be dark!quot; the commander ranted. It was just two o8217;clock in the afternoon but I held my tongue.

quot;Where is that engineer? I shall twist his neck!quot;

He rushed up the steps and I rushed after him, as I had never seen a neck being twisted. We could not believe it! A perfect concrete slab was drying itself in the sun. The wonderful workers had already finished their job, efficiently and gone home. My brother felt cheated. No noise, no fuss, no thefts, and no drinking water! Is that what we were paying the contractor for? The General could see no enemy in sight. You can understand how Nelson must have felt when he put the binocular to his blind eye before the battle of Trafalgar.

Story continues below this ad

The next operation was of watering the slab, but this was impossible to do it as it began to rain heavily. My sister-in-law had returned from her shopping and could not control her laughter when she heard the story. When she suggested that her husband should take an umbrella and water the slab, I thought it was a very practical suggestion. When my brother went to fetch the umbrella and the watering can, I slipped away to take some well-earned rest having been awake for all the afternoon.