Recently, in a detailed post shared on Instagram, actor Samantha Ruth Prabhu shared a note that captured the pressures of youth and the relief that often comes with maturity. She began by challenging a common narrative, stating, “The world tells you everything after 30 is downhill. That your glow will fade, your beauty will slip away, and you should rush through your twenties trying to be everything… perfect face, perfect body, perfect life… as if time is running out.” Looking back at her younger years, she wrote, “My twenties were loud, restless. I spent them hurrying. Hurrying to look enough, to feel enough, to be enough. Hurrying to hold the façade together so no one would see how lost I felt inside. No one told me I was already whole. No one told me that love… real love… would find me as I was, without twisting myself into someone I was never meant to be.” She contrasted this with the shift that her thirties brought: “Then came my thirties. Something softened. Something opened. I stopped dragging around the weight of old mistakes. I stopped trying to fit in. I stopped living two lives… the one I showed the world and the one I lived in silence.” Samantha concluded her note with a gentle wish for her former self: “I wish her the kind of peace that comes when she stops running and finally comes home to herself. Because when you are fully yourself… without apology, without disguise… You don’t just free yourself. You set the whole world free.” So, why do so many people feel such intense pressure in their twenties? Psychotherapist Sakshi Mandhyan tells indianexpress.com, “I define the twenties as a stage of emerging adulthood when people are still shaping identity, belonging, and purpose. It is a period when achievement anxiety peaks, given the constant social comparison. Social media heightens this anxiety by amplifying hand-picked versions of success. Also, family expectations and cultural timelines around career or marriage add to the sense of urgency.” She adds that when inner doubt collides with these external pressures, young adults often feel that they must hurry through life to feel worthy, exactly as Samantha described. “This truly explains why so many look back on their twenties as a time of striving rather than settling into themselves.” What typically shifts in one’s thirties that allows for greater acceptance? The thirties often mark a shift from proving yourself to understanding yourself. Mandhyan states, “With lived experience comes greater emotional regulation, which allows people to respond to stress with more balance. There is usually less dependence on external validation and a stronger focus on authenticity and meaningful connection. This stage is also shaped by cognitive reframing, where past mistakes are no longer carried as heavy burdens but are instead seen as important lessons.” Benefits of embracing authenticity Mandhyan notes, “I frame authenticity as a cornerstone of psychological well-being. When people live without disguise, they carry less stress and develop stronger self-esteem. Authenticity promotes secure attachment in relationships because others feel they are relating to someone genuine and trustworthy. It also encourages reciprocity: when one person is open, it permits others to lower their guard too.” On a wider level, she explains that this creates communities that are more accepting and less judgmental. In that sense, authenticity is not only self-liberating but also socially transformative.
