Mislead, unkindly light

Consumer research, a wise man once said, is like a lamp post. And he didn't mean that it was a kindly light that led you in the right dir...

Consumer research, a wise man once said, is like a lamp post. And he didn8217;t mean that it was a kindly light that led you in the right direction in the dark and stormy night that is advertising.

I think the wise man was actually referring to two other uses of the lamp post. The first is common to both the canine and the creative species: Piddling. An instinctive act performed by the former when he approaches a lamp post. And the latter when he approaches research.

I couldn8217;t tell you much about the inner urges of the dog 8212; I haven8217;t studied the subject post those Biology lessons in school about Pavlov8217;s slobbering pets. But about the motivations of the creative animal, when faced with research, I am voluble.

Imagine how you would react if the fate of your work were determined by some four unknown groups of six people each picked up at random from the desired quot;target audience profilequot;. These poor souls are expected to react spontaneously to an advertising campaign which is usually shown to them in itsrough form.

When asked for their comments, these consumer groupies typically remain silent at first. Then the boldest of the lot, wishing to appear intelligent, makes a clever remark. The others, not wishing to appear any less so, quickly say, quot;Me too, me too, I feel the same wayquot;. Then, of course, there is the contrarian in the group. She has remained silent. And after all the others have spoken, she speaks up giving exactly the opposite point of view. After all, isn8217;t that how one has learnt to stand out in a group?

It8217;s all a lot like school actually. Remember, when you used to try and impress Teacher with clever answers?

While this child8217;s play is happening in one room, the creator of the campaign is usually watching the proceedings on a closed-circuit TV in the next room. And dying a slow, agonising death.

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Afterwards, the creative guy may leave in a hearse. But the researcher flits happily home and files her report. Which is then presented to the client who commissioned the research in the firstplace. That8217;s where the second use of the lamp post, as enunciated by the aforementioned wise man, comes in. Some clients use it, like Roadside Romeos, to lean on, to help prop themselves up much like a crutch.

You see, the guy who has to approve the campaign is all too aware that there are lakhs of rupees riding on his decision. So, instead of using his own judgement, he spends lakhs more on research. So, if the wrong choice is made, research becomes the scapegoat. Job and reputation are saved.

The research report usually comes up with completely misleading conclusions, which you try to convince your client to ignore. Alternatively, it tells you a whole lot of common sense things that you already know in which case the client says, quot;It8217;s reassuring to know that we are on the right track.quot; This course of events, though pointless, does the least damage to the creative work.

But when the lamp post of consumer research shows things in the wrong light, the consequences can be disastrous. Like in thefifties, when a research agency told Univac that there would only be a handful of computers around by the end of the century, so it wasn8217;t a viable business. Another company, which couldn8217;t afford expensive research, went ahead and made computers. The name of that company is IBM. The makers of Finlandia Vodka were told that no one would buy a vodka that wasn8217;t from Russia. The epoch-making 1984 commercial of Apple computers would not have seen the light of day if research had had its way.

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The examples go on. And a lot of the ho-hum humdrum advertising that we see every day on our TV sets and in our newspapers and magazines are that way thanks to research. And the best stuff was either not run by consumer groups or released despite them. I could give you many examples, but that would be trading on insider information.

And so pardon me for being such a bitch. Perhaps there is some connection between the canine and creative species. Because, when I see this lamp post called research, I must admit I feellike raising a leg.

Sumanto Chattopadhyay is an associate creative director at Ogilvy amp; Mather Advertising. His opinions, however, are purely his; and should not be attributed to his employers.