Married alive

I turn 24 soon. That places me at an age when relatives who you last met when you were eight years old start calling your parents...

I turn 24 soon. That places me at an age when relatives who you last met when you were eight years old start calling your parents to talk about your impending marriage. More like your impending doom.

My grandfather is getting on and has this mental photograph of me with faceless husband and faceless baby, standing in front of our house. Clearly, he is not in touch with the current real estate situation. My grandma is more realistic. She says that my parents better start the search now: it won8217;t be before two years that we get the Right Guy. My mother does not consider the horrors she wants to put me through, a traditional Bengali wedding, where I will be heaved up and hurried around a fire by the men in my family, who will swear at me while they perform this noble service.

I call up my 8220;doctor cousin8221; and tell him about the situation. He tells me that I8217;m under pressure because he has recently revealed that although he will marry his long-time girlfriend next year, they have decided not to have any 8220;issues8221;. The Majumdar name has to be carried forward 8212; it is of little consequence if my children turn out to be drug peddlers or agoraphobics. 8220;Why do you have to be so dramatic?8221; asks my mother. 8220;How am I supposed to know what if my marriage is a disaster and they8217;re affected and they8230;8221; I trail off. On seeing that the discussion has taken a hysterical turn, my father, calm as ever, says, 8220;Okay, I have just decided not to arrange your marriage. You choose your own boy. That way, if it goes wrong, you can8217;t blame me.8221;

At this statement, the conversation becomes incoherent. Numerous people are participating, each shouting out their opinion. I run away to the balcony, close my eyes and breathe in the free Kolkata air. My father joins me a minute later. 8220;Do whatever you want. But if you choose to marry, don8217;t expect me to dress up in some silly dhoti. I8217;ve done it once, I refuse to do it again,8221; he says quietly. I look at him and promise him that he can come in his shorts if such a day should come.