If it146;s not mind blowing

... it8217;s rocking. Between the two, we8217;re in perpetual volcanic motion.

Mind blowing, man, mind blowing. By the weekend, we were brain dead. Prashant Tamang8217;s Indian Idol victory was 8220;mind blowing8221; 8212; so was RJ Nitin8217;s Ulta Pulta insensitive comment that mall owners and shopkeepers would have to guard their businesses by night. Rakhi Sawant8217;s costume and contortions during the dance contest, Nach Baliye 3 were mind blowing, an indescribable all-in-one circus show.

India8217;s T20 victory was described as 8220;mind blowing8221; by more than several commentators; so too Mumbai8217;s downpour and the outpouring of Mumbaikars for the victors8217; open bus ride have they nothing better to do than spend the entire morning out in the rain acquiring and spreading viral infections?; Sa Re Ga Ma Pa8217;s three finalists were repeatedly felicitated with 8220;mind blowing8221; compliments from the judges 8212; and we promise you, the sight of Himesh Reshamiyya8217;s never-before-seen smile and hairless V chest was mind boggling, man, mind8230; When the above were not 8220;mind blowing8221;, they were 8220;rocking8221;. Between the two, we8217;re in perpetual volcanic motion.

If you still have any wits about you, you8217;re likely to lose them after watching the costume dramas, more popularly called dance contests. Rakhi Sawant was not the only one to look like she had worn home furnishings; host Hussain stole his grandmother8217;s chintz curtains, Alexx O8217;Neil and several other contestants painted themselves along with their bedroom walls while Vikas slunk into his mom8217;s finest kanjeevaram silk. This could be intentional, to divert attention from less than spectacular fusion dances. The more you watch Nach Baliye 3, the more and more it resembles nautanki.

Meanwhile, Pooja Bedi spends all her time auditioning for the Hindi film version of Shall We Dance 8212; first on Jhalak Dikhla Jaa, now Nach8230; Also, to uneducated viewers, people like Krishna and Kashmira seemed to be gymning more than dancing.

Sony8217;s Jhalak returns with a much better ensemble and show all around. The judges 8212; Jeetendra, Urmila Matondkar and Shiamak Davar 8212; bring three very different perspectives to their job. And once you have Cyrus Broacha as a contestant, well, anything can happen. By the way, his shirt was honestly, mind blowing 8212; a midnight blue sky with curlews. The presence of Kasauti8217;s Mr Bajaj, hockey coach Negi Chak De role model for SRK, and Sandhya Mridul makes for a tip-top contest.

Amber-Dhara Sony. This new serial deals with the medical wonder called Amber and Dhara, teenage sisters who can never be parted. Wherever Amber goes Dhara must go too 8212; even for ablutions. They are conjoined twins and according to a weeping mother, the doctors say that Amber will not survive even one degree of separation. This would be mind blowing, nay, heartbreaking news for any one with tearducts, were it not for one minor detail: Amber-Dhara forget they are conjoined. Supposedly joined from their shoulders down to their waists, the two actors often forget their status: Amber8217;s left arm goes up and Dhara8217;s down or left. Amber swivels her hips, Dhara stands motionless. Funny, were it not an injustice to those with such handicaps. Which mindless wonder thought up this one? Two TV commercials. First Maruti SX4. Where have all the men gone, asks one woman. There are none, replies a second, and a third agrees. Out of nowhere, different coloured Marutis drive into view and brake next to the women. Now, says a woman, that8217;s a man. Dunno if this is more an insult to the women8217;s eyesight, men or machines. What8217;s the implication? Men look and function like cars? The Pampers ad claims that a baby will grow half a millimetre while sleeping 8212; if baby wears Pampers because P has an extra layer for 10 hours dryness. By this logic, children should wear Pampers until there are 18 years old.