Freeze it, it146;s cricket

At last. No more watching the very latest, up-to-date lack of news about Rai-Bachchan, or Jolie-Pitt and Hurley-Nayar; no more hiding behind Bani or Saloni8217;s tears, Parvati or Tulsi8217;s years; and certainly no more palmistry with Shah Rukh Khan.

At last. No more watching the very latest, up-to-date lack of news about Rai-Bachchan, or Jolie-Pitt and Hurley-Nayar; no more hiding behind Bani or Saloni8217;s tears, Parvati or Tulsi8217;s years; and certainly no more palmistry with Shah Rukh Khan. As he would say, 8220;Freeze it8221;. The dreaded evening is upon us.

Say goodbye to friend and foe alike; bid farewell to family and strangers, switch off the computer, the mobile, the brain. Settle back and make yourself as comfortable as possible for 52 nights of undisturbed sleeplessness. Irritability. Anger. Frustration. Ghostly figures running up and down before your eyes. That8217;s right: For each one of you who hates the sight and sound of cricket, what can we say but wear a blindfold, cotton wool your ears and pretend you8217;re snoring. Or else, take a long, cruise 8212; but not to the Caribbean.

It8217;s World Cup 2007, from today.

And it had better be better than the telecast of the warm-up matches last week. Max treated it less seriously than the Indian team. There were few score lines, fewer stump visions, rare replays and missing action. They could not wait for an over to be completed before they broke for the real thing. You know, a word from the sponsors, or 15 from the advertiser. Aaaargh. Think of what we missed: Irfan Pathan running into bowl his 5 no-balls/wides in a row!

Moreover, how can you have a match in which India is playing without an Indian commentator 8212; even if it was only Charu Sharma you know, the guy who gets to sit next to Mandira Bedi for the next six weeks? We heard from Tony Cozier, Michael Holding, Jeff Dujon, John Wright and closer to home, Aamir Sohail, but no Indian heart beating in the commentary box 8212; dil hai ke manta nahin! We can only suppose that Max is deliberately withholding its best for the tournament. It has to be good, otherwise8230;

Right, for all of us who may find a television that does not want to eat, drink and not sleep cricket, and for those who like nothing more, here are a few other shows: We recommend Durgesh Nandini for those who want to watch Hema Malini in Seeta Aur Geeta, four days a week. Durgesh has actually whipped the errant family into shape. The family wishes to inherit their father8217;s Rs 5,000 crore as we are told 5,000 times. Perfectly natural. Except that they took the very unnatural step of killing the father as well as incarcerating the mother. They hadn8217;t bargained for Durgesh who has taken control of the family fortunes and their lives. Watch on.

There8217;s Kaajal, this pretty girl who is about to marry one guy but finds that the man she actually loves has a very poor horoscope which predicts that the woman of his dreams will be his last and fatal nightmare. Can8217;t seem to get away from them, these devilish night creatures. If these are not to your liking, how about Niyati in Kulvaddhu who marries Shaurya who agreed to marry her but then decided he preferred Jahnavi who also preferred herself to Niyati for him! and while this unhappy threesome chose to frolic in a hotel, who should come in and ruin everything but Kitu Gidwani as the very unconvincing mother of Shaurya, looking younger and prettier than Jahnavi and Niyati and you wish the story had been about her and Milind Gunaji her screen husband instead.

If you are the picky type, we suggest you watch the next celebrity wedding of which you will see nothing. You8217;re not supposed to, you weren8217;t invited, except by the media which, since it cannot bring you Saat Phere like Zee does shows you around old forts/palaces and 8216;personality8217; homes. From the outside. Prefer to watch Travel 038; Living who take you inside.