How to approach highly sensitive people

Recently, Lisa Ray confessed that she and her daughter fall into the category of highly sensitive people. “We are classic HSPs who easily become overstimulated and need time alone to regulate our minds, souls and bodies. Our sensitivity equips us with vivid imaginations and a large dose of empathy as well. It took me years to understand and appreciate my HSP traits: non-conforming, introverted, poor social stamina and highly sensitive to the emotions and frame of mind of others close by,” she mentioned in a post on Instagram which shows her reading a book The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron.

She further shared that now she cherishes her “unique temperament – it’s my strength in a shouty world- and I’ve learned to draw careful boundaries”. “I avoid large, noisy gatherings and people with the personalities of a large, noisy gathering. You will never find me at a concert or super noisy restaurant. I crave solitude and the company of other HSPs. Our society doesn’t value the HSP as much as it should, or as it has, historically speaking. People with my temperament were traditionally the more thoughtful and learned keepers of wisdom: judges, royal advisors, writers, spiritual practitioners who balanced the impulsive and tough warriors,” she shared.

Important to have empathy (Source: Getty Images/Thinkstock)

According to Ray, even today, whatever our vocation an HSP is less likely to pursue it like an aggressive warrior but more like a priest or royal counsellor – with thought and foresight. “(I’m using classical archetypes not trying to imply all priest or advisors had stainless intent),” said Ray.

What helps when dealing with such individuals?

Clear communication is crucial; be mindful of your words and tone. Establishing boundaries helps prevent overwhelming situations. “Encourage them to embrace self-care practices and coping mechanisms. Recognise their sensitivity as a unique strength rather than a weakness. In essence, fostering understanding, patience, and compassion facilitates positive connections with highly sensitive individuals, fostering harmonious relationships,” said Dr Ankita.

Dr Chhibber too agreed and shared that one should gently encourage the person to also build perspective of where one might have been coming from. “Probe to see if they would want to work on their sensitivities to modify the belief systems that might be at play which are leading to the response on their behalf. If they are open to working on these aspects help them identify an expert they could work with,” said Dr Chhibber.

Here are steps that can help, according to Dr Ankita.

1. Empathy First: Acknowledge and validate their emotions without judgment.
2. Maintain Calmness: Keep a supportive and calm demeanor to create a safe space.
3. Clear Communication: Be mindful of words and tone for effective and open dialogue.
4. Establish Boundaries: Set clear boundaries to prevent overwhelming situations.
5. Encourage Self-Care: Suggest and support self-care practices and coping mechanisms.
6. Positive Reinforcement: Recognise sensitivity as a unique strength, not a weakness.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by lisaraniray (@lisaraniray)

7. Foster Understanding: Prioritise understanding, patience, and compassion in interactions.
8. Create Safe Spaces: Cultivate an environment where they feel comfortable expressing themselves.