Chennai’s Mr Ramu is having 365 meals, not 365 dates, for charity

It’s more a meal since Ramu isn’t really looking for a relationship, but then who would care for a story which said ‘Man wants to eat 365 meals with women'

Sunder Raman with his meal friends

“I want to date 365 women.” Now normally, this kind of statement is unlikely to go down well in any part of the world. The man will be denounced as a sexist, playboy, and much worse.

But one Chennai man’s plan to date 365 women has actually won him some praise. Why? Because it’s in all the name of a good cause. According to a Newsminute report, Sunder Ramu, who is a fashion photographer in Chennai, has pledged to go on dates with 365 women (has scored around 113 so far) and will not pay for a single date. Instead the women pay for the date and whatever money he saves, he ends up donating to an NGO. How noble.

The NewsMinute report has a gushing account of how “at the end of each month” good man Ramu goes to an NGO and “sponsors a meal for all the residents of the home which they all eat together.”

Story continues below this ad

He tells the website, “I was getting too comfortable being alone, which scared me. I decided that I was going to explore life and meet more and more people. Going to the club feels fake, and so I thought of going out on dates.” Wonder if the NGO bit came as an afterthought.

And what a journey it has been so far. Celebs in Chennai, a 105-year-old, a 21-year-old, even DMK chief Stalin’s wife, a garbage collector, have all gone on ‘dates’ with him. Technically it’s more a meal since Ramu isn’t really looking for a relationship but then, who would care for a story which said, ‘Man wants to eat 365 meals with women.’ Calling it a ‘date’ is what really gets the media interest going, which isn’t a bad idea. And making it 365 dates is a bigger plus, especially if you’re the right gender.

The whole double standard in the way this is covered is hard to ignore. Wouldn’t eyebrows be raised if woman went on 365 dates in a country like India? The answer is always yes. Just follow the blog ‘Fifty Dates in Delhi.’ Even though the author has made it explicitly clear that she doesn’t want to sleep with any of her dates, men expect it all right. Some of the messages she’s shared are downright scary, but hey if you’re a woman in India with a social media account it’s likely you’ve gotten these at some point.

Even if you don’t judge a woman for going on 365 dates (why should you), somewhere a story like that gets linked to women’s safety as well. Bet no one asked Ramu, ‘Aren’t you scared of going on dates with all these unknown women?” No doubt, if you’re a man in India, it is easier to find a female date who won’t pose a possible security threat in the future. After all, women don’t assume that a date necessarily means sex, a fact lost on most men in India.

Story continues below this ad

Logic also dictates that you ask: Why couldn’t Ramu just do ‘feed the people at the NGO’ without linking it to his dates. You also wonder: How expensive are the dates that this man goes on that he ends up feeding so many people later.

In an age where Tinder, Snapchat, even Facebook are the tried and tested ways of finding dates in the more traditional sense of the word, Ramu tends to stand out. You can’t really club him with the rest of the folks on social media, who are busy hunting for new partners each weekend. While the rest of us, decide dates based on looks, interests and of course location, good man Ramu is just looking for a journey, a social cause.

Never mind the social cause, if you’re a cynic like me, you’re likely rolling your eyes at all this fuss over Ramu’s 365 ‘dates’.