Word play

Midday Sunday India lost to you-know-who. 8220;Infuriating,8221; complained the NDTV 24215;7 anchor looking rather pleased to be on air at that time?. 8220;Yes,8221; agreed a calm M.A.K. Pataudi, 8220;it is infuriating.8221;

Too mild for our Halla Bol friends in the Hindi news studios: 8220;Yeh Beimaan Hain8221;, hit out Aaj Tak, 8220;Both umpires are beimaan,8221; potshot Zee News, just in case you thought either Bucknor or Benson were 8216;fair8217; weather friends. 8220;Recall the team8221;. An hour later, it had simmered down. 8220;Sydney ke villain,8221; the lady anchor8217;s teeth chattered with the chill in Indo-Australian relations. And, if you still didn8217;t get it, she roared, 8220;Benson hunts down Ganguly and Dravid is Bucknor8217;s shikaar.8221;

Times Now asked: 8220;Umpires cheat India?8221;as though it had missed the match, and then its correspondent who had watched the match stepped up: 8220;Clearly shows Aussies were not playing a clean game and wanted to win at any cost. BCCI suspects foul play8230;8221;

8220;8230; The spirit of the game is being killed,8221; dead-panned Aaj Tak. If CNN-IBN was less violent in its reaction it was because the 8220;Sydney shocker8221; had stunned it. CCC Chief Cricket Correspondent! Nishant Arora recovered sufficiently to say it was an 8220;ugly series8230; The Australians have a habit 8212; they don8217;t like people pointing at them8230;8221; 8220;Cheats!8221; Headlines Today pointed the finger at them.

With the umpires dead-goners, Zee decided to finger someone else: 8220;Yuvi kamzor kadi kyon?8221; it asked. The answer was there on Friday and Saturday: Yuvraj Singh celebrated his birthday on Star News and Aaj Tak with a cake, candles and a red, heart-shaped balloon Aaj Tak that bounced off Yuvi8217;s chest on to Deepika Padukone8217;s. And Sunday, when India8217;s Twenty20 hero became a zero in Australia, the camera turned to find Deepika in the stands. Hmmmn.

Monday saw Aaj Tak and Star News at full throttle. Aaj Tak has got a poet8217;s soul, or at least a rhyming one. No one does headlines better. Commenting on Harbhajan8217;s ban, it said 8220;Game of shame8221;. The Indian team8217;s delayed departure for Perth was 8220;Sydney mein satyagraha8221;. Meanwhile, Star News has learnt from sister, Star Plus, how to self dramatise. It replayed Bhajji and Symonds like it does those saas-bahu confrontations: Why was Symond8217;s word taken and not Sachin8217;s? Blah, blah blah: 8220;Harbhajan ke saath Hindustan8221;. And then, music. No, it wasn8217;t the national anthem but could have been.

Did TV go too far? Of course. It was excessive. And, it was what we all wanted to hear. Admit it.

In the commentary box Sunil Gavaskar dissected, bisected the Australians, while Ian Chappell waited three overs before commenting on Ganguly8217;s dismissal even as Harsha Bhogle needled him. For a garrulous, straight from the bat guy, this was curious. And when he did break his silence it was to disagree with Gavaskar about Clarke8217;s catch and wonder who Benson questioned, when the replays clearly showed it was Ponting.

Suggestion: Time for Star Sports to hold a contest for good umpires on its Dream Job show and for Star Cricket to get neutral commentators. And remember, no more monkey business.

shailaja.bajpaiexpressindia.com