How Ugly Are You?

Rs 249

Known as DogWars in its earlier Beta avatar,the controversial dog fighting app,denounced by animal rights groups,has returned to the app store with a bark. Players train their virtual pets to bite,fight and maul their opponents’ dogs to death. “Just because something is illegal in real life in certain countries,does not mean it is illegal to make a song,movie,or video game about it,” the developers rationalise on their homepage.

PhoneBomber for Android

Free

This multi-player game creates a disturbing world where players detonate virtual “explosive delights” such as the M60,Crazy Debby,El Torro,and Powder Keg,but in real world locations. From virtual nukes that can take out entire cities to smaller bombs that a player can use to hurt another,the developers proudly display a destruction world map on their website and admit that “game reality is overlaid with the real world”.

UglyMeter for iPhone

99 cents

This popular app can supposedly tell you how ugly you are. By taking a picture of your face and apparently scanning your facial structure and symmetry,the app gives you an ugliness score on a scale of one to 10. A high score comes with a witty,intentionally hurtful quip: “You are so ugly you could model for death threats” or “You could walk through a haunted house and come out with a pay cheque”. A low score heaps flowery praise on you. The developers have also launched an UglyMeter for babies,in case “you have a friend with an ugly baby and you just don’t know how to tell them”.

Weed Farmer for Android

Rs 247

Grow 30 types of cannabis on dedicated online servers to win virtual cash and compete for a position on the leader boards. The highly rated game,downloaded over 80,000 times,is set to dopey music and features such exotic weed varieties as the Humbolt Trainwreck,Hindu Widow and Stanford U,each with its own unique needs like lighting,potency,market value etc. The app,which comes with a warning about mature content,is riding high on positive reviews.

Nose Candy for Android

Rs 99

Nose Candy is a self-proclaimed “party fun” app that turns snorting coke into a game and makes the Roll Your Own iPhone app seem an instructional video. “Show iPhone users an app they can’t get!” the developers urge on their homepage. The user — pun intended — dumps white powder from a vial,piles it into a neat line and snorts it up,virtually,of course. When he or she “catches a buzz”,the phone vibrates,and at the end of each session,the user counts the dollars snorted up. With four difficulty levels — “I can smell fine”,“It won’t stop bleeding”,“I work on Wall Street” and “I govern New York” — the app has logged over 50,000 downloads.

Wobble for iPhone

99 cents

The Android marketplace has many breast morphing apps,but Wobble is one of the few to have passed Apple’s scrutiny. While the app does not mention breasts explicitly,the description says it all: “Add wobbly bits to any parts of your iPhone pics. Shake your iPhone for realistic 3D bouncy goodness! The most fun you can have for just 99 cents.” Terminology is everything on iTunes: Apple reportedly took down a similar app “iBoob” even as it turned a blind eye to Wobble,which has grossed over a million downloads.

Amateur Surgeon for iPhone

Lite version free,$2.99 to buy

When a pizza boy runs over a recently disgraced doctor,bloody hell ensues. The boy must cut open Dr Ignacious Bleed,reset his ribcage and suture the wound — all with the help of a pizza cutter,a stapler and other precarious tools. By its own admission,Amateur Surgeon puts “your wildest surgery fantasies in the palm of your unwashed,unqualified hand”.

tech@expressindia.com