Freeing love

Four years ago,when the popular actress Khusboo spoke her mind about premarital sex,she had no idea she was going to kick off such a big brawl on public morality. A great swarm of FIRs 22,no less descended on her,from outraged Tamil activists and citizen forums. To her credit,Khusboo stuck by her words and,now,the Supreme Court has come to her defence,saying,Living together is not an offence. Living together is a right to life.

Her accusers alleged that Khusboos endorsement of premarital sex would have a morally corrosive effect on young people,and lead to spoiling of the entire institution of marriage and chaos in the society. The court swatted down that argument asking for empirical evidence that her remark had led to any real incident,and why her personal opinion bothered them anyway. Besides,it sensibly pointed out,it seemed unlikely that Khusboos opinion had the singular,awesome power attributed to it,in a time when young people were inundated with sexual information in this age of the Internet.

The Supreme Courts life-affirming declaration must be applauded. It is in line with the world we live in,where hypocritical social and sexual conventions are fraying for many young people,and a wider array of choices are being legitimised. The evidence of this great mental unbuttoning is all around us in contraception adverts,in the movies,on campuses and neighbourhoods. But we are still reluctant to acknowledge the fact,forced to hide and dissemble,because our public culture is still shot through with prudery and hypocrisy. Instead of viewing a relationship as a reciprocal partnership,it rests on a premise of shame and fear,and fundamental inequality between the idealised,defenceless woman and the predatory male. In fact,when women reject patriarchal straitjackets and inject a dose of reality and agency in their relationships with men,they tend to do what they feel like doing,and gain meaningful ownership of their own selves as equals.