Shining India, Swinging Advani

My political editor friend, part of the BJP think-tank, has opined that Elections 2004 will be the turning point for the BJP. What has convi...

My political editor friend, part of the BJP think-tank, has opined that Elections 2004 will be the turning point for the BJP. What has convinced him that a BJP 8216;8216;wave8217;8217; is around the corner is that everyone who is anyone has joined the BJP. He claimed that those who felt that the BJP was anti-intellectual should realise that V S Naipaul and Hema Malini love the same party.

Did they figure in some Page 3 item at some party? I wondered. I am talking about BJP, the rise and shine party, explained my friend, it is not only Congressmen who want to defect to the BJP. The defection of Poonam Dhillon to the BJP has made even the Big B sit up and think.

But what stumped me was his next prophesy. Watch out for our brahmastra, he warned. It is Advani who may end up actually 8216;8216;swinging8217;8217; in the 8216;8216;slog overs8217;8217; with his Rath Yatra.

8216;8216;What is the purpose of this yatra when millions of voters have already been soaked with India Shining messages through TV ads. What purpose does it serve to spread this message personally?8217;8217; I asked, not impressed.

The friend glared at me with his shining eyes. 8216;8216;This is the problem with non-techy journalists. Our latest survey has revealed that the younger generation of MTV watchers is totally with us because India is shining. But the problem is the rural youth, many of whom are unemployed. We have to tell them that although they may be without a job they should at least applaud the fact that India is shining. It is in this context that Advani8217;s rath would address the wrath of unemployed voters in the countryside. He is targeting millions of voters across a 8000-km drive where there are no TV sets.8217;8217;

8216;8216;Doesn8217;t this show India is not shining there. In any case why does the BJP choose the rath to resolve all its issues? Can8217;t they think of any other means of transport?8217;8217; I asked, wondering how a medieval rath could add gloss to India8217;s achievements.

8216;8216;We initially thought of a padyatra,8217;8217; explained my friend, 8216;8216;but we felt that the elections would be over and a new government in place by the time Advani covered the entire distance by foot. Bullock carts were discarded because the air-conditioned security cars accompanying him would have broken down since they can8217;t travel at slow speeds. Some even suggested that Advani be taken on a palki, but it was turned down because it was estimated that the entire RSS from all across the country would have to be enlisted to carry him across forty days. There would be no one to man the polling booths in the rest of the country.8217;8217;

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8216;8216;On the one hand you claim it is a rath but it has TV, Internet and hydraulic lift 8212; the works,8217;8217; I countered, still not convinced.

8216;8216;This is an effective way of communicating the message to rural voters,8217;8217; was the reply. 8216;8216;According to Prahlad Cooker, our ad man, the sight of Advani rising up in the lift would woo several voters who may have seen Advani but have never seen a lift.8217;8217;

8216;8216;But where is India shining in the villages,8217;8217; I asked.

8216;8216;You know nothing,8217;8217; was the punch line. 8216;8216;In cricket, to effect a reverse swing only one side should shine. This is ideal. Even if India is not shining in the countryside, Advani would bowl his reverse swing that would sweep the countryside!8217;8217;