A Bourdain goes past putdowns

But this wasnt a sordid afternoon delight.

It was 3 oclock on an unusually warm autumn afternoon and Ottavia Busia Bourdain,the wife of Anthony Bourdain,the professionally profane chef and host of No Reservations,rolled around on a midtown Manhattan floor with another man. They grunted and groaned.

But this wasnt a sordid afternoon delight. Bourdain,34,is a mixed martial arts fighter,an aspirant to the league of the Ultimate Fighting Championship,and she was training,as she does nearly every day,at the Renzo Gracie Academy.

Bourdain is a petite auburn-haired Italian with a wide smile and what looks to be no body fat. She is the straight punch to her husbands exuberant looping swings: lean,mean and disciplined. But as widely exposed as Anthony Bourdain is,she has thus far been seen only in glimpses. I hate being on TV, she said.

Now Ottavia Bourdain is ready to step out from her husbands long shadow.

Last week she was the subject of her own episode of No Reservations,in which she competed in a Brazilian jiujitsu tournament. She is trying to find a taker for a TV series about a motley crew of maladjusted restaurant workers called Employees Only,for which she is executive producer. And this month she will compete in an International Brazilian Jiujitsu Federation Open competition in Miami.

This is not the life she had envisioned. I had a very nice Italian life, she said. I grew up in a small town in Lombardy. I was studying to be a dentist.

But in 2000 she unexpectedly decamped to the US,to follow an Irish rock musician she was in love with. She became a general manager at Geisha,a Japanese restaurant for which Eric Ripert was a consulting chef. It was Ripert who introduced her to Anthony Bourdain.

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Both were heavy drinkers,smokers,eaters and partyers. Their first date was to a cigar bar; their second was to Masa. A few dates later,they had matching tattoos of a chefs knife put on their shoulders. And after a few more dates,they married.

Ottavio Bourdain is as outspoken as her husband. In a recent New York magazine article chronicling her diet,she called a steak she had at an unnamed steakhouse in Las Vegas an abomination.

In 2008,Ottavia Bourdain saw the mixed martial arts fighter Gina Carano and found the perfect outlet for her aggression.

After six months of training at the Renzo Gracie Academy,Bourdain entered her first Brazilian jiujitsu competition in March 2011. She did not fare well. I thought I was going to kill everybody, she said. But I choked.

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She redoubled her efforts. These days,much of Bourdains time is spent in the gym. She also maintains strict rules. She never smokes. She doesnt drink. She rarely carbo loads.

Back at the Renzo Gracie Academy,Bourdain and Leo Leite,a Brazilian jiujitsu black belt,circled each other. In one quick fluid movement,Bourdain darted in,drove him to the mat. They tussled,finally,he tapped to signal submission.

When I see an opportunity,I take it, she said. Thats how

you win.