Poll hangover — till May 13

Here is the other truth. I, like millions of others, find opinion polls and exit polls even more exciting than the real polls. In fact, if the polls had predicted a 330-plus for the NDA, tell me, would anyone have watched TV? Thanks to a ‘‘last-minute late swing’’ we’re in a contest. So are the sponsors, the TV experts, the psephologists, and of course the hapless politician who ‘‘feels good’’ with one opinion poll but bad with the next.

Which leads to the point I am trying to make. Who in his right mind would want to head a party to form a government when the majority eludes it? Would the BJP want to do business with Mayawati? If so, what is the price? Would the Congress sacrifice Sonia Gandhi as its leader in order to accommodate partners averse to her ‘‘foreign’’ leadership?

These are tough calls but there is no dearth of leaders wanting to take them. Vajpayee himself says he is neither tired nor retired and has no plans to sink into oblivion, that he is here to fight. Sonia too is determined to remove the NDA at all costs. While these two are serious contenders, others have joined in too — Sharad Pawar with 15 MPs, Mulayam with 25, Mayawati with 13, even a Deve Gowda with 4. As long as the buzzword is ‘‘hung’’ many more can be added to the list.

So it did not surprise anyone in the household when Mukul, my Man Friday, suggested that I throw my hat in the ring. ‘‘You are still young, you can climb podiums faster than many others in the fray, you can speak Hindi with a Hindi accent, and you are both Lok and Loha Purush.’’ Mukul was obviously looking for another job. I protested. ‘‘How do I cobble together a majority if the Parliament is hung?’’

‘‘If either the NDA or the Congress falls short of a majority,’’ opined Mukul, ‘‘you can ask Mayawati for support. In return, you could water down the Taj Corridor case. Besides all you have to do is create a Cabinet with 11 coalition parties or 14. Whenever they threaten to leave, you succumb to their pressure and relent. You leave administration to the bureaucrats and you are laughing your way to the vote-bank.’’

‘‘Assume I sacrifice my principles because the nation wants me to become the PM. What do you intend to do?,’’ I wondered. ‘‘You know there are strict rules about employing servants at the Prime Minister’s residence…’’

‘‘Don’t worry,’’ was Mukul’s reply. ‘‘I propose to be a psephologist on national television. I look credible and have the communication skills. One has to analyse a mass of data very convincingly.’’

‘‘Get a life,’’ I told Mukul, ‘‘As Prime Minister, dealing with the high and mighty, I guess it will be difficult to give you any time.’’

‘‘To be brutally honest,’’ chirped Mukul, ‘‘I wouldn’t mind watching politicians and Prime Ministers like you squirm when I come out with my exit polls.’’