People146;s paradise

What more appropriate destination than the People8217;s Republic of China for the new CPM general secretary8217;s first foreign visit? As ...

What more appropriate destination than the People8217;s Republic of China for the new CPM general secretary8217;s first foreign visit? As Comrade Karat zips around meeting with Chinese Communist Party officials and scholars and is enveloped in the warm bossom of a true workers8217; paradise, he may be overcome with mixed emotions. After the daily wrangling with the reactionary UPA back in Delhi, he must surely enjoy meeting up with his comrades, north of the Himalayas.

But Karat, as he goes about the Middle Kingdom, must know that language in China too has mutated. The Chinese word for 8216;comrade8217;, tong zhi, is now used by cheeky youth to describe someone drawn to members of the same sex.

Comrade Karat may be forgiven for nipping off to Beijing8217;s Forbidden City for a quick look-see. At the palace8217;s southern entrance, the gigantic portrait of Mao would appear a propitious start to the tour for any good communist. However, he may be miffed at being confronted with a Star Bucks outlet 8212; packed to the gills with Chinese slurping on their Mocha Frappacinos 8212; that graces the inner sanctum of the palace.

Dismissing this aberration, the comrade would move on to sample the architectural delights of the palace by switching on his audio guide that he coughed up 10 for. Immediately, the soothing tones of Roger Moore would come on to instruct him on the wonders of the dragon carvings above the throne room. He may then decide to navigate his way through the palace with the aid of the explanatory plaques in English that dot the Forbidden City. He won8217;t be happy to know that they are all sponsored by American Express.

Having exited the palace, Comrade Karat may then decide to stroll through Beijing to take in the sight of happy workers cycling to work. Instead he will be greeted by two million cars zooming down Beijing8217;s six-laned avenues, all in a tearing hurry to get to their appointment with their company8217;s foreign investor, or to fit in a quick shopping trip for the latest miu-miu shoes. But Comrade Karat should not despair. He should remember that these RayBanned yuppies have been schooled in the intricacies of Marxist-Leninism and Mao Ze-dong thought. Both subjects remain compulsory in all universities here. The Chinese know how to produce good communists.

In any case, Comrade Karat can console himself with the thought that Beijing can hardly be considered as representative of such a large country. His next stop is Shanghai. Now surely there he will find his workers8217; Shangri-La.