145;Papa is dead146;

Sandeep, a 33-year-old company secretary on his way back home to Bhayander from work in Colaba, was among the 41 bodies brought from the blasted compartments at Mahim and Matunga stations.

Each of the 41 is a man, as are the 40-odd patients in the hospital being treated for injuries caused by the explosions.

Tuesday8217;s Terror, either by design or because male compartments made simpler targets, has overwhelmingly attacked men. At last count, there were 183 dead among whom only four were women.

A senior city cop who has probed terror attacks on Mumbai in the past argues: 8216;8216;Men might not have been attacked by design but simply because it was the easier thing to do. Targeting women compartments would mean the modules having women operatives who will place at least 3 kg RDX in a compartment and slip out.8217;8217;

But while women and children aren8217;t Tuesday8217;s overt targets, the blasts have left scores of wives widowed, children fatherless, and in several cases the sole breadwinner gone.

Like Ajaz Khan 41, travel firm employee, survived by a wife, an 11-year-old daughter, and a 10 month-old son; Tushit Shah 44, a broker who8217;s left behind his wife and 15-year-old daughter; businessman Lalit Kachalia 42 survived by his wife and son; former hockey player Sanford Desales 44, survived by his wife and daughter who is 10; tour operator Salaeeh Shaikh 42, survived by wife and three children; chemical engineer Parag Karambalekar mid-40s, survived by a college-going daughter and wife; Anuj Kilawala 47, an insurance agent, survived by his wife, a daughter and a son; police constable Shashikant Bedekar 32, survived by a wife and two young children; bank manager Vinod A T 45 survived by a wife and a school-going son and daughter; Paresh Thakar 37, an insurance seller, survived by wife and school-going daughter.

These men8217;s deaths aren8217;t just untimely but also very brutal, ensuring that outside hospital morgues across the city8217;s suburbs, it was colleagues and male relatives of victims who got together to shield as far as possible from wives the violence of the loss.

So Jhawar and a group of friends were faced with the problem of timing the transfer of dismembered remains for its last rites with Sandeep8217;s parents arrival in Mumbai on a afternoon flight from Jaipur.

8216;8216;The head and a hand is missing so we can8217;t take his body to his wife. We identified him by a ring on his right hand,8217;8217; shuddered friends.

Said inspector A Deshpande who was at the hospital8217;s police chowky preparing pachnamas for the relatives to reclaim their dead: 8216;8216;A wife or blood relative is needed for the paperwork as per our procedure. That is posing a problem since most of the dead are men.8217;8217;

As specialists point out, the pain of the bereaved is severe, and will play out in less tangible ways far from the spotlight, in private.

Bombay Psychiatric Society President V Matcheswallah says: 8216;8216;While partners will have to deal with a gamut of emotions from shock and disbelief to anger, children depending on their age will be affected differently at this break of the family structure. Younger children risk developing depressive and introverted personalities because of the absence of a male role model at home.8217;8217;

Matcheswallah is talking to peers to formulate an aid programme that can counsel Tuesday8217;s bereaved, in facing life without a partner and parent.

Meanwhile, there are those who are being stoic. Insurance agent Paresh Thakkar heading home to his wife and daughter on Tuesday evening was killed on the spot by the 6.25 Jogeshwari station blast.

Says his boss V Rao: 8216;8216;When I finally got through to Paresh8217;s family at night, his 10-year-old daughter Mansi answered the phone, and calmly told me: 8216;Uncle, Papa is dead8217;.8221; Rao says Thakar8217;s wife Mansi is preparing to fill in her husband8217;s shoes, intending to learn how to sell insurance.

She told Rao: 8216;8216;My husband was passionate about his work. I know I must carry it on.8217;8217;

Among victims, four women

The death toll in the Tuesday blasts in Mumbai is now 183. Among the victims were four women. Three of them were:

8226; Hemlata Yadav: A 19-year-old volunteer for the Home Guard since just over a year, she was on duty at Platform No 3, Borivali station, when a bomb blew up a train compartment at 6.24 pm killing her.

8226; Nandini Naik: A Santacruz resident and ICICI bank employee, Naik, 28, was also killed by the blast at Borivali.

8226; Kumud Shah: A Borivali resident, she was killed by the 6.25 blast at Jogeshwari station