Colonial hangover

In the morning it is all a jumble. A curious cocktail with a bit of patriotism, a bit of colonialism, Queen Victoria, Wright brothers and...

In the morning it is all a jumble. A curious cocktail with a bit of patriotism, a bit of colonialism, Queen Victoria, Wright brothers and fifty years of Independence all stirred together in a Patiala peg. And there was a song accompanying it all. In whose voice was it? Was it Jim Morrison, the cult figure of the sixties, or Bade Ghulam Ali Khan of the Mughal-e-Azam fame.

Where and when can such diverse elements meet? At the bar, of course. More so if the bar-room be of the imperial variety with aquatints of the Raj and fading pictures of the Patiala Maharaja hanging on the walls. And the bar-tenders in true princely generosity adding the little extra to have the place fondly nicknamed the Patiala Peg. It is the right setting for the ghosts of the past to rise a la Shyam Benegal8217;s Trikal. There8217;s no need even to have a beauty of Leela Naidu antiquity with a medium as comely as a young Neena Gupta to bring back the forefathers. A peg or two down the throats and the process starts on its own.

The trigger ispressed by trying to be as Indian as we can in spite of being brought up in a colonial culture. Heresy has it that a slightly tipsy Padmaja Naidu, daughter of Sarojini Naidu, got a caustic remark in the pre-Independence era from a Brit: 8220;So this is Miss India.8221; She was quick to answer back: 8220;Yes, this is Miss India but brought up in traditions of the West.8221; With what pride this exchange was quoted by the subjects of colonialism. No, it is not just finding a convenient scapegoat. The schizophrenic personality in which Indian roots and Western upbringing are constantly at loggerheads.

So the poet host in this bar of an imperial variety insisted on spirits of of the Indian make. Or what is advertised by liquor shops as Indian Made Foreign Liquor. The absence of Solan No: 18242; was irksome. Imagine the bar goes by the name of Patiala Peg and does not have the Solan brew when Solan was once a part of the Patiala domain. Worse still there was no music sung by Bade Ghulam Ali Khan, doyen of the Patiala gharana.Never mind, said a lawyer friend. Jim Morrison8217;s songs were good enough.

And gradually spirits rose higher and higher but got trapped at the tail-end of the Indian air crafts. The tail-end which has VT8217; inscribed on it. Indignant the poet said: 8220;It stands for Victorian terrain. Just imagine the word terrain.8221; The lawyer intervened. 8220;Yes, VT is part of the Imperial legacy. One of the many laws which were not amended. But it does not denote Victorian Terrain. It is an abbreviation for Viceregal Territory.8221;

This led to a heated debate. 8220;Victorian Terrain!8221; insisted the poet. 8220;Viceregal Territory,8221; held the lawyer. Neither was willing to accept defeat. A man in a jacket was asked to be the judge, for he looked like a pilot. He begged off saying that he had nothing to do with air crafts and knew nothing of what was on their tail-end. It is just then that the lawyer got a bright flash which settled matters. Queen Victoria had already been dead when the Wright Brothers invented the aeroplane.

Trueenough, the Mallika had died in the first month of 1901. And the American brothers Wilbur and Orville Wright of Dayton, Ohio, made the first straight flight in a man-carrying aeroplane in 1903. They made the first turn in the air only in the following year.

Story continues below this ad

The poet8217;s was the imagined truth and the lawyer was basing his argument on facts. Anyway, it seemed that the colonial ghost had been laid to rest until the poet chose another one. 8220;I am all for the Queen,8221; he declared. 8220;The one gone and the one living. But then why is it British Kingdom/ It should be British Queendom8230;.8221;