Avancular angst

Many much older to me have taken to addressing me as uncle. Agreed, I am slightly bald. But surely that does not give anyone the liberty to arbitrarily add years to my life? Earlier, I used to be addressed as 8216;bhai8217; or 8216;bhai saab8217;. Now that 8216;bhai8217; has become an underworld title, it has fallen 8212; rightly I think 8212; into disuse. But why 8216;uncle8217;? I have tried to explain to many who have wrongly called me uncle that I was not their 8216;uncle8217; 8212; either by age or by relation. But they do not seem to be convinced. To top it all, my niece to whom I am actually an uncle, prefers not to call me uncle, but by the plethora of pet names she coins for me.

Given this state of affairs, it is very apt that the finance minister has now decided to define what precisely is meant by 8216;senior citizen8217;, otherwise anyone with grey hair could lay claim to being 8216;uncle8217; and claiming all manner of concessions. For income tax purposes, the age marker is 65. For investing in the government8217;s Senior Citizen Savings Scheme, the age is 60 years. For railway travel, it is again 65 years.

My uncle, who is really an uncle by any definition 8212; he is now 80-plus 8212; used to carry with him all the senior citizen identity cards that he has right from his school-leaving certificate while travelling by train. I have warned him several times that since he looks much younger than his years, the ticket examiner will not believe him and he could end up paying a fine. He has so far been successful in convincing all the TTEs on all trains about his actual status.

At 18, one became an adult by default. Similarly, thanks to the finance minister, at 60 one becomes an 8216;uncle8217;. Officially. By this yardstick, I should be spared the agony of being called an uncle for the next 17 years of my life. And then, when I do turn 60, I may be an 8216;uncle8217; officially, but at least I can lay claim to the savings schemes that the finance minister has just made available to every 8216;uncle8217; in the country. Officially.