Animal movie review: Ranbir Kapoor, Anil Kapoor wasted in this pointless, vile tale

Everything in the overblown plot is bent towards underlining this toxic relationship between father and son. We are supposed to be in sympathy with this loveless man-child, so everything he is responsible for — tossing off a crass remark to a girl (Rashmika Mandanna) he’s met again after several years, which rapidly leads to a romance in which she is completely in thrall to this guy who thinks violence is the answer to all his problems, the crude below-the-belt situations especially created for bursts of low-rent humour, the bloody action sequences in which limbs are blown off faster than you can count — is fine, because the poor boy got no lovin’ when he was a child.

Of course, the steady affection of his mother (Charu Shankar) and sisters does not count, because ‘it’s a man’s world’. Just in case we had any doubts, a character is made to say it out loud in the movie. The women, which includes Rashmika’s loyal wife Gitanjali who is given a couple of scenes in which she tries standing up for herself (look, ma, I’m not being the submissive missy) and Tripti Dimri’s brief appearance as a bit-on-the-side, all stand-by to react once the men act.

Ranbir Kapoor and Anil Kapoor in Animal.

In the first half, Vanga is in complete control. We get a quick tour of rural Punjab, which is just an excuse for a dozen burly ‘puttars’ to jump in: more boys, more toys, more risible jokes featuring the male nether regions. A kinetic sequence featuring a gigantic bazooka, and Ranbir Kapoor pumping hundreds of bullets into hundreds of bodies is the kind of gleeful comic-book action which is fun while it lasts. But then comes the endless second half in which everything is thrown at the kitchen sink in the hope something sticks, but nothing really does, not Bobby Deol who pops up as the guy whose family has history with Kapoor’s papaji, not his trio of women who are there strictly to prove Deol’s virility, not.. it goes on and on.

This is a film stuffed with good performers, especially the two main characters: both Anil Kapoor and Ranbir Kapoor make as much as they can of their parts. But the film’s meandering length and purpose defeats them. Anyone who has been following Bobby’s recent exploits in ‘Ashram’ will recognise his character here, as it is more of the same. But finally, all the toys are kept aside for bare-bodied action between the battling boys: if you don’t hear bones scrunch, what’s the point? Vijay Singh’s unquestioning acceptance of his own misogyny makes you cringe: poor Kabir Singh is nothing in comparison.

In the end, there’s nothing to this pointless, vile tale: if I have to, I’d rather watch real animals.

Animal movie cast: Ranbir Kapoor, Anil Kapoor, Bobby Deol, Rashmika Mandanna, Shakti Kapoor, Suresh Oberoi, Sidhhant Karnick, Charu Shankar, Prem Chopra, Saurabh Sachdeva, Madhu Limaye
Animal movie director: Sandeep Reddy Vanga
Animal movie rating: 1 star