Old Wives’ Tale

As if being implicated in a coal scam wasn’t bad enough,Union Coal Minister Sriprakash Jaiswal also has to deal with the consequences of voicing his opinion on wives. “Patni purani ho jati hai phir woh mazaa nahin rahtaa hai (when wives become old,there is no fun)”. Somehow,it sounds a lot more brutal in Hindi. Not surprisingly,the indefatigable National Commission for Women is up in arms,reacting furiously to the minister’s pedestrian observation. Except,Jaiswal should be told it works both ways. His comment,typical of all MCP’s,presumes and suggests that the wives continue to be happily married,while their husbands view them as jaded,old,has-beens.

Jaiswal’s remark is not without resonance,culturally. Movies like The First Wives Club — about three divorced women seeking revenge on husbands who left them for other women — validate his opinion on long-term marriages and relationships. Reams of newsprint has been dedicated to tracking the Jolie-Pitt-Aniston romance. The thrice-married Donald Trump,who famously dumped wife Ivana for a much younger woman (she has a cameo in The First Wives…) and ended up losing a lot of his fortune in alimony,had some words of advice for fellow billionaire,Mark Zuckerberg: get a pre-nup. Anyone who has been married for decades,male or female,has probably felt like Jaiswal,but some things are just better left unsaid. Especially loudly,in a gathering. One assumes Jaiswal speaks from experience. I’ve never set eyes on his wife but if she’s old and charmless,after his remark,you can add crusty and seriously cheesed off to the list. Even the nicest,most forgiving wife would slowly roast a husband for thrusting her in the limelight for being a dull bore. And Jaiswal’s seemingly harmless remark has undone him faster than far more serious allegations levied very recently. But the scathing retorts are directed solely to his unsavoury comments on wives (that have now even been adapted in an Amul ad). He’s become a figure of ridicule on Twitter and the Opposition is having a field day sneeringly referring to his ‘enlightened’ views while burning his effigies.

The old saying used to be,never tell a journalist anything you don’t want to see in print. Now you have to add,don’t say anything that can be re-quoted in 140 characters or pose for a photograph with a thug. Fact check and rehearse your speeches,because the digital world archives everything: old tweets,photos,and videos on YouTube,that can be pulled out at the click of a button,and become a potential weapon in a political campaign. Social media has ensured that a moronic quote or byte has a surprisingly long shelf life,magically resurfacing when the chips are down. Despite the celebrity- obsessed tabloid culture we live in,we like tearing down the same people we’ve propped up,and watching rich and successful people fall. Jaiswal is hardly the first politician to be ambushed for shooting his mouth off. There are many politicians who’ve seriously gaffed across the world with varying consequences. Most famous has to be Bill Clinton’s quote on marijuana: “I smoked but I didn’t inhale”. Or Prince Philip’s comment in 2000 to Australian aborigines,“Do you still throw spears at each other?” Let’s hope the brickbats from the media and the internet doesn’t spook politicians entirely,as it is,it’s so rare to hear an unrehearsed opinion. We need the gaffes for a few laughs,if nothing else. hutkayfilms@gmail.com