Serbia8217;s dying Oppn sees life in assassination bids

Vuk Draskovic, the leader of the largest Opposition party and a well known novelist, was the first to claim an assassination attempt. Earlier this month he survived a collision between a heavily laden truck and his motorcade, inwhich four of his close associates were killed. Never one to miss a moment of drama, Draskovic denounced 8220;the assassin truck8221; as an attempt by the regime to do away with him. 8220;Who was Vuk8217;s assassin?8221; runs a popular joke in Belgrade. 8220;Marko President Milosevic8217;s son, taking his heavy-goods vehicle driving test.8221;

But now a more glamourous explanation has presented itself. Weeks after the incident, a previously unheard-of organisation calling itself the Serbian Liberation Army Wasp has claimed that it carried out the assassination attempt.

8220;Wasp wishes to inform the Serbian people that it tried to assassinate the treacherous, pro-communist Vuk Draskovic,8221; the organisation said in a statement. 8220;Wasp never forgives anyone.8221; In true communist bureaucratic tradition, the communique was stamped with an official Wasp seal.

Draskovic8217;s main rival in the Opposition movement, Zoran Djindjic, is thought to be green with envy. 8220;Djindjic would give his right arm to be assassinated,8221; quipped oneBelgrade journalist. Not to be outdone, Djindjic has now revealed a government plot against his own life. Quoting 8220;reliable sources in the police and state security service8221;, he claimed that mysterious helicopters had been buzzing overhead, taking pictures of his movements. 8220;The building where I live has been photographed, as well as the entrance to the building, the lift and the door to my flat,8221; Djindjic said.

The Belgrade ruling class also has its parallel world a wonderland where membership of the international community is pursued through beauty pageants.Earlier this month, Belgrade played host to the glitzy Miss Yugoslavia 8217;99 contest. A demimonde of gangsters, businessmen8217; and paramilitary leaders turned out to watch the likes of Miss Internet, Miss Body and Miss Charm Belgrade parade their assets. International respectability was assured by the presence on the jury of the correspondents of CNN and The New York Times.

8220;And the winner is..,8221; announced the distinguished Times journalist,unfurling the scroll in the best beauty contest tradition. 8220;It was a mistake,8221; he admitted afterwards. 8220;I agreed to do it because I thought the organiser was my interpreter8217;s girlfriend.8221; The lady in question runs an escort agency.

Since the conflict with NATO, Belgrade has become a centre for movie-making. The low rates commanded by local actors and the availability of locations like the Hyatt hotel, now empty of the pack of war journalists, have attracted the production team of a new Italian film. The leading actor, a Serbian male model, explained that much of the drama would be played out in a hotel suite. 8220;I am a gangster,8221; he said. 8220;At the end of the film I get killed by my wife8217;s lesbian lover.8221; While Belgrade8217;s financial elite gets richer and the Opposition squabbles about assassins, the people of Serbia are bracing themselves for a winter of power-cuts and shortages. In this Wonderland, the grinning Cheshire Cat is Slobodan Milosevic.

8212; The Observer News Service