It8217;s getting to me8230;

But if food poisoning was the first thing that really got to me, then the other thing that is really getting to me are the endless pool clubs springing up everywhere. Hamaare desh mein yehi to problem hai. Ek naag ki picture hit hojaati hai to 50 naag ki picturain banti hain aur flop ho jaati hain. Ek 11-gaanewale love story hit ho jaati hai to 370 11-gaanewale picturain launch hoti hain aur flop ho jaati hain. Nobody has an original idea anymore.

Let me further explain my point. Do you remember seven or eight years ago, this exclusive ice-cream was launched that was supposed to melt away the competition. It was called Dollops. And Dollops was exclusively meant for the rich, in short Dollop sirf daulatmand logon ke liye thi. So exclusive was this ice-cream meant to be, that parlour owners who thought that they had an exclusive hit ice-cream in their parlours invested in massive neon signs and great publicity. Going to Dollops with your family was an exclusive occasion and also a very expensive one. Three months later, this so-called exclusive ice-cream was available at every galli and nukkad with every panwallah at one-fourth the price. Its exclusivity had melted away! Uh-uh! Same joke again butchalta hai 8212; repeat value hai!

I predict the same thing is going to happen, if it8217;s not already happening, to the exclusive pool clubs which in three months time, thanks to competition have brought down their rates from Rs 100 a game to Rs 20 a game. So much for an original idea. Why do people have to play pool anyway? Why can8217;t they just stay at home specially on a Friday at 8.00 pm and watch Kehne Mein Kya Harj Hai on Sony TV? And on Sunday at 6.15 pm and watch Ikke Pe Ikka on Zee Cinema?

The other thing which is really getting to me is the summer heat. And more than the summer heat, the thing which is getting to me is talk of the World Cup. Every product that you see in the market today, whether it is a cold drink, a ceiling fan, talcum powder, toothpaste or even a chaddi and baniyan are selling exclusive tickets to the World Cup finals. To aao consumer bhaiyon aur behnon, ek cold drink peeke, talcum powder lagaa ke, fan ke neeche baith ke, chaddi-baniyanpehen ke contest mein hissa leke World Cup ki ticket jeetenge.

What8217;s so special about the World Cup anyway? Even I have a World Cup at home. Yes, I swear. My uncle had this tea cup sent to my house from Japan 8212; thanks to Air India8217;s luggage department, it arrived after one month.

Literally after travelling half the world. So, this is the actual, official World Cup.

If you think this is getting too much, then we can talk about UFOs and flying saucers. You want to see flying saucers? Just tell my sister that the tea she has made is bad. Not only will you see a flying saucer, you will also see a flying World Cup.

Anyway doston, I8217;m just going to lie back here and melt away in the glorious heat of our city. Woh kya hai, ki mera AC kharab ho gaya hai.

Because my AC is not working, the last line of my column has to be, Meri AC ki tesi ho gayi8217;.

Sajid Khan says if you think this kind of humour can8217;t get worse, then you have to see his shows.