English bargain

They were professional planters rather than salesmen. But when it came to disposing of their surplus assets prior to retirement...

They were professional planters rather than salesmen. But when it came to disposing of their surplus assets prior to retirement, Munnar8217;s British tea planters did drive a hard bargain.

In a recurring ritual, furniture, sports equipment and household goods were religiously advertised for sale through notices in department stores and clubs. Locals eager to flaunt British goods 8212; or resell them for a profit 8212; turned up in droves, armed with their most persuasive bargaining skills.

However, the Brits were astute. They boosted their prices sufficiently to ensure that after the usual haggling they got the price they expected. Few buyers ever got things cheap 8212; and certainly not from a Scotsman.

One Scotsman reportedly demanded a high price for a bottle of Scotch. His justification was simple: apart from maturing in the distillery for 12 years, the whisky had mellowed for a further three years in his liquor cabinet!

Another offered me his collection of around 50 Agatha Christie thrillers. 8220;Pay me whatever you like,8221; he said amiably. I8217;m getting them cheap, I thought when, like the 8216;Queen of Suspense8217;, he sprang a surprise on me by coolly adding, 8220;I expect at least Rs 200.8221; I smugly clinched the deal for Rs 175 8212; only to learn that I could have got them far cheaper since there were no other takers!

I also recall the wily cook who tried to sell some fancy china he had wheedled out of his retiring employers. When a prospective buyer asked him its source, he lied brazenly, 8220;I8217;m selling this for Mr and Mrs Bateman.8221;

Perhaps the retiring Brit8217;s most-sought-after asset was his car 8212; usually a well-maintained Morris Minor, Vauxhall, Austin or Renault, then prized status symbols among Munnar8217;s locals. Indeed several of these vintage relics graced the hill-station8217;s roads long after the Brits had left.

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Durability was certainly a hallmark of British products in those distant days. I still use a fishing rod bought from a planter in 1960 while a cousin8217;s shotgun bought in 1961 is still in fine fettle.