Opinion The Revised Crictionary

Following IPL’s post-coital paroxysms,no one is betting on what the climax will be like and whether the three newly appointed umpires can spot the fixers and fix the game..,er blame. Meanwhile,historians appointed by Boria Majumdar are busy compiling a new book with revised cricketing terminology. Sources in the Special Sell reveal some of the new lexicography,in alphabetical order.

Asking Rate: Original meaning: Number of runs per over required for a team chasing a score; Revised: The rate demanded by certain players to concede specific number of runs per over.

Away Swing: Original: Delivery that deviates away from the batsman: Revised: Deliveries by M S Dhoni to deviate from any questions on the IPL scandal.

Appeal: Original: The act of a bowler or fielder pleading with the umpire to declare the batsman out; Revised: The entire country,led by Arnab Goswami,pleading with BCCI President N Srinivasan to declare himself out.

Ashes: Original: The perpetual prize in an England vs Australia Test match series; Revised: Collective taste in the mouth left after the sixth IPL season.

Bail: Original: Pieces of wood placed on top of the stumps; Revised: Given to one of the three accused players so he can get handcuffed,matrimonially.

Bodyline: Original: A controversial tactic in the 1932-33 Ashes Tour with bowlers targeting the batsman’s body; Revised: Tactic in IPL 2013 with bookies using the bowlers’ body language to convey a message.

Bye: Original: Extra conceded with the ball not having touched the batsman; Revised: What an increasing number of BCCI members are hoping Srinivasan will say.

Benefit of doubt: Original: When an umpire is unconvinced about a decision,the batsman usually gets the benefit; Revised: The benefits given to former cricketers by the BCCI so they remain on Srinivasan’s side.

Beamer: Original: A delivery that reaches the batsman at head height without bouncing; Revised: The expression on BCCI officials’ faces before the scandal broke.

Block hole: Original: The area between where the batsman rests his bat and his toes; Revised: The area Srinivasan is protecting to fend off the half volleys.

Catch: Original: What bowlers can do to induce to get a player out; Revised: What the Delhi Police are trying to do so they can keep the players in.

Cut: Original: Shot played using a cutting gesture; Revised: Cut obtained using a pre-ordained gesture,as in a towel in a waistband.

Corridor of Uncertainty: Original: The area where players find it difficult to decide how to play the ball; Revised: The video showing Sreesanth in a hotel corridor seemingly undecided on how to proceed.

DRS: Original: Decision Review System; Revised: Decision to Remove Srinivasan.

Dibbly dobbly: : Original: Delivery that is easy to hit; Revised: Delivery by Dhoni that hinted at “mentally weak” players who were easy to hit on.

Extras: Original: Runs gifted to the other side in a variety of ways; Revised: Variety of gifts offered to players to cross to the other side.

Hat trick: Original: Three consecutive wicket taking deliveries in an over; Revised: Three players trapped by the Delhi Police for consecutive deliveries in the same over.

Power Play: Original: A block of overs that offers a temporary batting advantage; Revised: The block required to give a temporary advantage to the BCCI boss.

Silly point: Original: A close-in position on the field; Revised: Position taken by Gurunath changing his close-in position as Team Principal to “cricket enthusiast”

Spell: Original: The number of continuous overs a bowler bowls before being relieved; Revised: The state

M S Dhoni seemed to be in while answering questions at a press conference in India and England.

Throwing: Original: An illegal bowling action; Revised: An illegal bowler.

Wicket maiden: Original: Bowling a maiden over which also includes a wicket; Revised: What Sreesanth is accused of doing with various women while also earning by not getting a wicket.

Wrong ’un: Original: The other name for a googly ball; Revised: The other name for IPL.