I’m tired of painting monkeys. Not “painting” monkeys, but monkeys that paint. And painting parrots, elephants and dogs.A Jack Russell terrier named Tillie in Brooklyn, N.Y., sells her “work” for more than $2,000 and has exhibited around the world. She’s also an author. An artist myself, with some success I might add (only did the starving artist thing one year out of 30), I’ve worked both ends of the artistic spectrum.I’ve worked in a corporate art department, worked freelance illustrating books, magazines and calendars, exhibited in both group shows and a solo showing, and for nearly 20 years I’ve worked for newspapers. And that is how I was exposed, or overexposed, to animals as artists. It seems as if a month doesn’t go by without news and photos of the latest pachyderm or terrapin stomping or crawling around a canvas with its trunk or shell dipped in acrylics.There’s no harm in having Cleveland Metropark Zoo’s Huck the sea lion’s abstracts (like there’s anything else he could do) raise money for the zoo. But is it fair to call this stuff art? It’s one thing to pick up a hamster and use it as a paintbrush, another to expect it to paint a mural of its habitat.While artists and illustrators struggle to support their craft, art snobs and pet fanatics create a buzz and sponsor the likes of Sammy the Foxhound. It was a slippery slope created in 1964 when Swedish newsmen displayed paintings done by a 4-year-old chimp named Peter and credited the work to an existing avant-garde artist, Pierre Brassau. Praise for Peter’s work from duped experts muddied the waters and helped open the doors for opportunists and animal lovers to explore the possibilities of loading furs and feathers in temperas and gouache for profit.I know I’m not the only illustrator or artist who is running out of patience with all these pet Picassos and their patrons.So after exhaustive research (15 minutes), I’ve come to a conclusion—or a business opportunity. None of these canine/feline/equine/bovine, and yes, asinine prodigies has developed their full potential in working in an assortment of mediums and techniques. But like any truly talented artist, how do they know when one scratch or splat is too much?The answer is school. The Jeff Boyer School of ARK (Animal Renaissance Kennels).
