MSEB 8211; the great leveller!

When we arrived at our hosts8217; bungalow, our moods swiftly went into an upswing. The beautiful chandeliers sparkled, the crystal goblets caught light. But it was not to last. Suddenly, we found ourselves plunged into familiar darkness. The hostess wailed, 8220;Oh my God, not again!8221; One of the foreign guests inquired, 8220;What is this MSEB?8221; Pat came the reply 8211; Monday to Sunday Electricity Bandh!

Candles were soon brought out and conversation resumed 8211; naturally about the topic uppermost in our minds. A guest related how his wife kept showing him full-page advertisements on frost-free refrigerators. One day, they found themselves in a shop selling electrical white goods.

After examining several models, the salesman took them aside and asked them why they wanted to invest in a frost-free refrigerator, which would cost three times the price of an ordinary one. His logic was simple 8211; the Maharashtra State Electricity Board MSEB was kind enough to shut off power every day, so the ordinary refrigerator automatically converted into a frost-free one!

The talk then veered to the slump in the white consumer goods industry. The hostess blamed the MSEB, saying that because of several daily shutdowns, all her electrical appliances were of little value. At that stage, Mr. Know-All came to the defence of the MSEB, declaring that on account of the frequent shutdowns, many new items were now being manufactured 8211; emergency lights, small petrol-driven generators, voltage stabilisers, electric back-up systems for computers, hand-held battery-driven fans, solar water heaters8230;

In addition, he added, many repair shops had sprung up to repair household electrical goods damaged by wild voltage fluctuations. Business in supplementary lighting equipment such as candles, kerosene lamps, flash lights, gas lights also undeniably received a boost.

After some more conversation, it was time for dinner. We just could not wait forever for the lights to return. We groped our way to the table. Candle light is all very well, but I also like to see what I8217;m eating! Crash went a couple of glasses. Was it me? I decided I8217;d better get away from the table.

As I walked back to my seat, I stumbled into the old man sitting in the corner. He jumped up with a start and confided that he had been dozing the entire evening. Thanks to the darkness, no one noticed or laughed at him. He also told me of his bizarre dream. He had dreamt that he was a retired chief engineer of the MSEB who had just died. He had been making his way to the gates of heaven when he was confronted by God, who demanded to know why he thought he deserved a place there.

8220;No person who keeps people in the dark has any place in my domain. Go back to Earth and learn what it feels like to be an honest, harassed, tax-burdened citizen,8221; said God. 8220;Please God,8221; said the man, 8220;don8217;t send me back. I have earned my place here.8221; 8220;What?8221; roared God. 8220;You see, I have been the great leveller. Rich or poor, prince or pauper, politician or dedicated social worker, I treated them all alike. I kept them all in the dark except the politicians sometimes, but that was only on orders 8211; I always obey orders. Now, do you understand what a great job I have done and why I chose to come to heaven by right? 8220;Perhaps you have something there,8221; God conceded.

My wife came up to me. Everyone was going home. There was nothing to do or talk about. In the car, my wife purred, 8220;Wasn8217;t that a lovely party? That woman always wants to show off her expensively-decorated home, her exclusive crockery, her gourmet dinner, her authentic zari sari8230; well, what happened tonight? Nobody could see, let alone admire them. She was just like any of us.8217;

8220;Hmmm,8221; I thought, 8220;the great leveller!8221;