First Pandits to leave Valley still dream of return

Sarla, who is in Jammu for Martyr’s Day, which is observed on Taploo’s death anniversary, nurtures dreams of returning to the Valley despite the fears and the resentment.

‘‘I have this recurring dream of our house in Habbakadal, the streets and the people there,’’ she says. The initial shock over her husband’s death has now been replaced by a desire to see Kashmir return to normalcy.

Sarla, who lives with her two sons in Delhi, was in Srinagar for a brief period in 1996, when she filed her nomination for the Assembly election from Anantnag. ‘‘I went up to Gokadal, a few kilometers from my house, but for security reasons, I could not go further,’’ she says. Though she was defeated by NC’s Maqbool Dar by a thin margin, Sarla says she never the lost the will to return to the Valley.

‘‘The Kashmiri Muslims in Mattan and Khanabal campaigned for me then for the sake of my husband,’’ she says, recalling when Taploo — who was also the state BJP unit’s vice-president — was killed, Muslims were at the funeral and a bandh was called.

‘‘Even after my husband’s death, I was reluctant to leave Kashmir, but due to security concerns we had to,’’ she says. Sarla, a retired school teacher, says they initially feared for their safety even in Delhi. They didn’t put up a name plate at their door for years.

In the last 15 years, much has changed. ‘‘The lifestyles have changed, and the children have lost touch with Kashmir,’’ Sarla says. Her daughter, Kavita Saraf, who is married and lives in Jammu, says the ‘‘exodus from Kashmir’’ was a ‘‘bitter’’ experience, and it would take courage to go back.

‘‘Our neighbours still send messages. Muslim friends, who are looking after our land and property, keep telling us to come back.’’ She blames the Government, saying not much was done even when the BJP was in power. ‘‘My husband was a BJP leader,’’ she says, at least a statue could have been installed in his memory.