Celebs Like a Label in Their Stable

Movie stars and rocksters are turning into arbiters of vodka, cognac and horrible cocktails

Movie stars and rocksters are turning into arbiters of vodka, cognac and horrible cocktails
A few weeks ago I read that Dr. Dre will soon launch a cognac called Aftermath and that Snoop Dogg has also entered the cognac market. He will be in partnership with Landy Cognac, a drink that, until now, was famous mostly for its bottle, shaped like a curvy woman8217;s torso draped in a tiny red fabric dress.

Most celebrities, however, I would not take drinking advice from. Take Danny DeVito. The guy shows up on The View allegedly drunk on allegedly limoncello, and very soon afterward, a Danny DeVito-branded limoncello hits the market. I had high hopes for this one, since the Web site even has a catchy jingle: 8220;Danny DeVito8217;s limoncello! It8217;s a taste of life from this famous fellow!8221; But, sadly, it tastes mostly of sugar and leaves a strange, sugary sediment in the glass.

Donald Trump, an avowed teetotaler, launched a vodka brand a couple of years ago, boasting that it was quintuple-distilled. Well, Trump8217;s vodka tastes like something distilled five times: nothing.

Willie Nelson, who has a bourbon brand called Old Whiskey River, admitted he doesn8217;t really drink much anymore, claiming his wife got him 8220;into rice milk and now soy milk8221;. The bourbon tastes like it was made for someone who8217;s more into soy mochas than whiskey. Trump8217;s and Nelson8217;s boozes are produced in partnership by Drinks Americas, the same company creating Dr. Dre8217;s Aftermath cognac.

Perhaps the most successful celebrity spirits have been made by rockers. Former Van Halen frontman Sammy Hagar recently sold a majority stake of his highly regarded tequila brand Cabo Wabo to Gruppo Campari for 80 million. Motley Crue singer Vince Neil peddles a pretty decent tequila called Tres Rios. And Mansinthe8212;8221;the official Marilyn Manson Absinthe8221;8212;won gold at this year8217;s San Francisco World Spirits Competition.

Surprisingly, cocktails named after celebs are few and far between. One of the classic cocktails is the Mary Pickford, named for 8220;America8217;s Sweetheart8221;. The few cocktails named for contemporary celebrities are pretty trashy, which perhaps stands to reason. The Paris Hilton, for instance, is a mix of vodka, orange vodka and Mountain Dew. Back in May, when hype over the Sex and the City movie was in full roar, US Weekly featured signature cocktails for each of the four ladies, all of them, coincidentally, using Skyy vodka.

None of those, however, holds a candle to the worst celebrity-inspired cocktail: Crunk Juice, the mix of cognac and energy drink advocated by rappers such as Lil Jon on his CD titled 8220;Crunk Juice8221;. Though he owns a California winery, Lil Jon also markets his own energy drink, called 8216;Crunk!!!8217;.
_Jason Wilson, LATWP