All their worldly goods

This surely must be some kind of a joke that the Great Anarch in the skies has sprung on us poor mortals. Just when we imagined that we have finally got our politicians — with a little help from the Supreme Court and the Election Commission — to come clean and make a clean breast of their worldly possessions and inheritances for the general edification of voters, a Telgi comes along and blots the stamp paper. So while we may now, with an occasional reservation or two, vouch for the honesty of the men and women who will soon get to rule us, their affidavits may alas not bear the ultimate stamp of honesty because nobody, but nobody, would vouch for the authenticity of their stamp paper.

Are these solemn testimonies then worth the stamp paper on which they are typed? Or, to put it another way, is the stamp paper that bear these solemn testimonies worth the information carried therein? Is there a larger symbolism in this quirky coincidence that unleashes a Telgi on the nation just as it prepares to make its candidates suitably accountable and transparent before five crucial assembly elections? Should we take it as a sign from divine quarters that we, the people, are not quite ready for the dipped-in-detergent neta? Or perhaps we should desist from wrestling with such insolvable moral dilemmas and enlighten ourselves by reading the affidavits instead.

They do make engrossing reading. It’s nice to know, for instance, that a powerful woman like Sheila Dikshit has been sensible enough to invest in a few shares and bonds, just like any of us, for that rainy day no doubt — politics being so unpredictable. Or that Shivpuri’s Yashodara Raje Scindia has fairly modest means for a once true-blue royal — cash of Rs 15,000, bonds, shares, debentures amounting to Rs 57,463, a few baubles worth Rs 60 lakh and, yes, a quarter of her mother’s ancestral property, which they have not yet fully valued since the “matter is under consideration”. As for Ashok Gehlot, he has even come clean on the almirahs he owns. Under “other assets” he has listed two refrigerators, two air-conditioners, two colour televisions, four steel book almirahs, and one music system. Truly he does make some of us who possess five steel book almirahs squirm in discomfort.