Actor Richa Chadha recently opened up about her struggles with India’s fixation on fair skin and the impact it had on her self-esteem growing up. In a heartfelt revelation, she shared how comments about her complexion pushed her to secretly buy skin bleach, hoping it would change how people perceived her. During an interaction with Hauterrfly, she mentioned being visited by a lady when she was a young girl. “I remember koi lady aayi thi and said, ‘haye haye rang toh nikal gaya hai iska, poora kaali ho gayi hai,’ uss type ka kuch bolke chali gayi in the summer vacation (Some lady had come and said, ‘Oh no, she’s lost all her color and has become completely dark,’ and said something like that before leaving during the summer vacation). Of course my parents didn’t make a deal of it but it stuck in my mind… kyuki tab TV pe saare ads aise… woh kaalik si pot ke auraton ko present karte the ki ‘acha ye iski shaadi nahi ho rahi. Kyuki iske muh pe kaalik hai.’ (Because back then, all the ads on TV… they used to show women with dark complexions as if it was a problem, implying things like, 'Oh, she’s not getting married because her face is dark’).” She continued, “But at that time I remember I was very affected and I did buy that bleach. And then I hid it in the bathroom thinking that when mom and dad are busy, I’ll put it on and then I’ll be fair and then perhaps this auntie won’t talk about me in this manner.” However, she recalls that she was really short and despite hiding it, her parents were able to find the bleach. “They were very shocked by it,” she said. View this post on Instagram A post shared by HAUTERRFLY | A Fork Media Group Co. (@hauterrfly) Chadha’s story reflects a larger societal issue - how beauty standards can erode self-confidence and fuel insecurities. In a society where fair skin is often equated with beauty, many face similar challenges. But building self-confidence is possible, even in a culture obsessed with external appearances. Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, “Understanding that beauty standards, such as the obsession with fair skin, are often deeply rooted in colonial or patriarchal history can help reduce their influence on personal identity.” People will always have something to say, but we need to focus on what we think about ourselves and our beliefs. Five actionable steps someone can take to build self-confidence According to Khangarot, one can take the following steps to build self-confidence, despite the beauty standards: Practice self-compassion: Replace self-criticism with kindness. If someone makes a comment, it’s important to acknowledge your feelings but avoid internalizing them. Regularly affirm your worth through positive self-talk, such as "I am more than my appearance." Surround yourself with positive influences: Limit exposure to toxic environments, whether it’s social media platforms promoting unrealistic beauty standards or individuals who perpetuate negativity. Instead, surround yourself with body-positive and inclusive individuals who value you for your character and achievements. Challenge the narrative: Societal narratives require a shift. When you see or hear discriminatory remarks or ads promoting narrow beauty standards, advocate and empower - not just yourself, but also those afraid to speak out. Focus on inner growth: Instead of dwelling on what isn’t working or doesn’t make you feel complete, focus on cultivating new hobbies, learning skills, or exploring new interests. Celebrate diversity: Make it a habit to appreciate beauty in all forms. Compliment others on attributes unrelated to appearance, such as kindness, humour, or intelligence. How does addressing internal self-worth differ from simply rejecting societal beauty norms? Rejecting societal beauty norms is important, Khangarot says, but true confidence comes from addressing internal self-worth. This means learning to value yourself independently of external validation. Internal self-belief serves as a lasting shield against fluctuating societal norms.
