UPSC Ethics Simplified | Emotional Intelligence: Self-awareness and self-management – The caselet

THE CASELET

Here’s a caselet for your UPSC Ethics preparation: 

Mohanlal’s daughter Muniya was sitting quietly in the class; that’s the way she had been for so many years. Muniya was most of the time under the tree of silence.

“Muniya? Today is Father’s Day. What do we do on this occasion ?” her teacher asked. Muniya got nervous because she did not understand the question. She had only picked the word ‘father’. “Stand up in class. If you don’t know the answer, let me know.” Now Muniya felt frightened. She stammered, “Mohanlal ….father… sweeper.” All the children laughed in class.

She was returning home after school. She went to a good school as she got admission through government quota, but she had never been comfortable with the idea. Most of the boys and girls were from the affluent class, due to which she used to become a laughingstock. She was returning home and was not willing to go to school again.

“Muniya, poor girl. You have no idea about the teacher’s question. You shared the name of your father and his profession. But we wish our father on the occasion of Father’s Day. The same way as we wish on birthdays or marriage anniversaries,” Sonali said. And later she taught her about wishing on those occasions.

After returning home, Muniya began her daily routine activities. She and her mother used to clean the home every day. Her father Mohanlal was responsible for swabbing the floor of the hospital. He had just returned. Muniya remembered the teaching of her friend Sonali. She gathered all confidence and said, “Papa. I went to school today and….” She lost those words.  Her father was tired, so he went to bed a bit early. Dhaniya had not understood anything. Muniya asked, “Maa, when is Mother’s Day?” Dhaniya replied,” Mother…mother”.

Muniya was very much upset with herself, but was determined to wish her father on Father’s Day. Now the clock was moving very fast, as it was 11 pm already, and she was preparing to go to bed. Her eyes kept oscillating between her parents and the clock. Suddenly, she looked towards the palm of her father. It was looking in bad condition. She quietly left the bed.

The broom was there. Muniya took her old dress and made a cushion in the middle of the mop where her father’s palm used to get stuck. “What are you doing at this late hour, Muniya?” Mohanlal was standing behind her. At first, she got nervous, but the clock was close to midnight now. Muniya returned the broom towards father and whispered, “Happy Father’s Day, Papa!” And poor Mohanlal felt rich that night. He hugged Muniya and kept on holding the broom.

The next day Sonali was visiting the school with her parents. She said “Muniya, meet my father and mother. Today is their marriage anniversary. Would you like to wish them?” Muniya took a pinch of soil and touched the feet of her parents and said, “Happy Father’s Day, Happy Mother’s Day.”

Maybe Muniya had not understood the meaning of marriage anniversary but she used to live with the words and the meaning of ‘father and mother’. Sonali smiled and so did her parents. Muniya was walking confidently towards her class. And so was Mohanlal towards the hospital, while holding the broom close to his chest. And Dhaniya was muttering, “Happy daughter’s day.”

Ethicist view:

Muniya struggled to communicate but her urge to express herself had been high due to that consciousness of self-awareness. Without fail, she was willing to wish her father and even stand in the class upright. Her Emotional Intelligence (EI) has been so high that she wished her friend’s parents too and that too without any inferiority complex. She looked determined to connect with those fathers’ wishes before the day could pass. It is interesting to note that despite a few dilemmas her higher form of self-awareness and self-management empowers her with confidence, care and conviction while connecting with parents, teachers, or friends. Even higher EQ saves her from the web of inferiority or superiority complex. This is very important for officers in governance and aspirants preparing for UPSC exams too.

She took the advice of her friend in the right spirit and was simultaneously unfazed by her limited understanding of the English language.

Post Read Question: 

Here’s a simple question for your UPSC Ethics prep. Can you find the incidents of self-awareness and self-management in this case? If yes, how will you connect in a governance setting?

(The writer is the author of ‘Being Good and Aaiye, Insaan Banaen’ and ‘Ethikos: Stories Searching Happiness’. He teaches courses on and offers training in ethics, values and behaviour. He has been the expert/consultant to UPSC, SAARC countries, Civil services Academy, National Centre for Good Governance, Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI), Competition Commission of India (CCI), etc. He has PhD in two disciplines and has been a Doctoral Fellow in Gandhian Studies from ICSSR. His second PhD is from IIT Delhi on Ethical Decision Making among Indian Bureaucrats. He writes for the UPSC Ethics Simplified (Concepts and Caselets) fortnightly.)

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