Opinion Across The Multiverse

There is no one direction in which reality can go. Ask Stephen Hawking, who was beamed into Sydney Opera House this weekend to console grieving Zayn Malik fans. A month ago, the dreamy, brown-eyed star had left a black hole in many hearts as he walked out of the British boy band, One Direction. But in a parallel universe, Hawking suggested, Malik and his bandmates were still as one. Better still, the average Zayn Malik fan may find herself married to him in one of the multiverses. Nothing like a bit of theoretical physics for wish fulfilment.

Yet if pop culture has taught us anything, it is to let parallel worlds be. As a Terry Pratchett character puts it, “Everything you imagine is happening out there somewhere”. But things get messy in Pratchett novels when multiverses start leaking into one another. Star Trek comes with a mirror universe that contains dark doubles of the main characters. In a parallel world in Doctor Who, zeppelins fill the skies of the Republic of Great Britain and cybermen are running the show. Don’t mess with the worlds, all the books and movies seem to warn. Plot after plot advises mortals to stick to the maxim: no more beyond.

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Still, theoretically speaking, there are worlds in which all cosmic pop culture grievances are set right. The Beatles haven’t broken up. Harry Potter has not lost his godfather, Sirius Black. George Clooney is not married. James Franco got so self-reflexive that he turned into a walking reflection of himself. My Best Friend’s Wedding has ended as it should have, instead of sensibly. It is also possible that, in one of the verses, Simon Cowell has rubbished One Direction after their performance in The X Factor and Zayn Malik is a complete unknown, thus saving millions of would-be fans the heartache of his departure. Theoretically.