This week’s column is a series of moments, culled from a bouquets of channels. See a person often enough and he grows on you. Rather like hair. Rather like A P J Abdul Kalam. Throughout July he’s been on television so frequently that by the time he was sworn in as President of India on Thursday, we had grown accustomed to his face, accustomed to his hair, accustomed to him (thank-you My Fair Lady). Also, there’s a geniality about him which is rather engaging. Arun Jaitley might take a few lessons in relaxation from the President. With his pleasant manners and articulate views he has been one of television’s favourite politicians. Now as BJP spokesperson, its General Secretary in charge of states like Gujarat and the government’s emissary to Kashmir, he is walking-talking television every day. This over-exposure can rob him of his charm. In one discussion on the Gujarat polls (DD1), Mr.Jaitley appeared strained, stern. Television discussions are all about accommodation and Mr.Jaitley, once adept at bending it, is now visibly stiffening. Krishna-Arjun is as funny as the drought. The detective duo, apparently modelled on Remington Steele, simply cannot keep their bodies or their tongues still. So their actions and words are often directionless. The crime and its detection are incidental as the two squabble interminably A CNN (Monday) feature on Kashmir used Channel 4 (England) footage to track down ‘militants’ from across the border who believed in establishing an ‘‘Islamic state’’. It also dealt with custodial killings by Indian security forces and the desire of Kashmiris to be independent of India and Pakistan. As the international media conveys it, while there is foreign involvement in Kashmir, India is very much a part of its own problem. Indians Abroad (DD1) drove home the point that many Indians tend to more Indian abroad than at home. The NRI is a staunch desh premi. Listen to Pooja from the Canary Islands: ‘‘At the end of the road, we are Indians.’’ Or Oscar: ‘‘I want to marry an Indian girl.’’. And the middle aged lady in Andorra (where?): ‘‘I want to settle in India.’’ In places like Gibraltar, Sindhis dominate the business on the main road and are well ‘‘settled’’, yet they yearn for home. Phir bhi dil hai Hindustani. Part of being Hindustani means an Indian woman does not drink. Well, that’s changing: Neena Gupta’s Kanak in Saanjjhi (Zee) takes to drink out of sheer despair: her husband had married a younger woman, her attempts to have him charged with bigamy came unstuck. Here is the lead female character, not a vamp, not the ‘bad’ woman, taking more than a few sips to make the world go round. Krishna-Arjun (Star Plus) rotate so often, they’re in perpetual orbit. This detective duo, apparently modelled on Remington Steele, simply cannot keep their bodies or their tongues, still. As a result their actions and words are often directionless. On her own, Krishna Sharma C.A. was cute, even amusing. With Arjun, she is a caricature of herself. The crime and its detection are incidental as the two squabble interminably. It’s about as funny as the drought. From Monday, Madhuri Dixit will run a television marriage bureau. Though the Indian obsession with marriage suggests the show will be a hit, Sony may have overplayed its hand—When Star launched Kaun Banega Crorepati, they were careful not to raise expectations by a pre-launch promotion campaign So is Kammal (Zee) but then it’s supposed to be sad. Balaji Films’ new evening daily, inspired by Chandni Bar, has reached the stage where Kammal (please note the obvious symbolism in the choice of name), brought up by three women with questionable credentials, has married a rich, young business type. He spells trouble: any man who arrives at his own wedding with another bride, thus publicly humiliating the girl he was meant to marry, will treat Kammal wrong too. The serial is typical of Ekta Kapoor. Which means it should do well. Which Kehta Hai Dil (Star Plus), might or might not. The one-hour series about a middle class family, has much to recommend it. Foremost that it is not a saas-bahu story. Second, it is middle class, third its lead couple actually work, fourth it focuses on young people and fifth it takes up contemporary issues. However, it’s too loosely structured, the characters are ill-defined and the performances weak. Baazi Kiski (Zee) is the weakest link. This has to be the most unintelligent game show. Ever. After Khuljja Sim Sim (Star Plus). Last week, chef Sanjeev Kapoor pit his wits against comedian Jaspal Bhatti. Lending them support were their smiling wives. Silly questions are followed by stiff challenges: walk over there, take a handkerchief from you wife, tell a joke. If they had asked Bhatti to cook and Kapur to joke it might have been something. As it was. Viewership ratings indicate that the India-England one-day cricket finals at Lords did what nothing else could: dethroned Kyunki. and Kahani. Two useless thoughts: former cricketer and aspiring actor Ajay Jadeja should star in a serial about a young man’s struggle to become a cricketing sensation. Erstwhile actress and Mohammed Azharuddin’s wife, Sangeeta Bijlani would be an inspired choice as his co-star. Alternatively, India better keep up the winning habit. Finally, hello Madhuri Dixit. As of Monday, she will run a television marriage bureau. Our obsession with the institution of family and marriage, suggests the show will be a hit, even without Dixit’s undeniable charms. However, has Sony overplayed its hand? When Star Plus launched Kaun Banega Crorepati, they were careful not to raise expectations by a grand pre-launch promotion campaign. Dixit, on the other hand, has been appearing in endless promos for Kahin Na Kahin Koi Hai, just as Govinda did for Jeeto Chappad Phad Ke. And we all know what happened to that.
