Fifth Coloumn — It’s time to say goodbye

When I asked them what exactly they thought was wrong with the column, they said that there was very little that was right about it. My language was too flippant, my analysis too simplistic and my choice of subjects tended to go beyond the range of politics. In other words what they were basically recommending I do was write lengthy, boring analytical pieces on the consequences for mankind of Laloo Yadav scratching his left ear or Mulayam Singh taking tea with Sharad Yadav.

I do not always take advice but I always consider taking it so I spent weeks brooding over the counsel of my political pundit colleagues. I read what they wrote, what everyone else wrote and even made it a point to plough through those long, pompous treatises that we usually see occupying the larger space on edit pages. At the end of all this research I realised that I could not take the advice so generously offered by my leaders and betters for the simple reason that I could not write in the way they thought political columnists were expected to write. The other and more important reason why I could not take the advice was because I believe fundamentally that there is more to political column writing than analysing the latest brawls in our political parties. In Third World countries (I am deliberately not using the euphemism `developing’) virtually everything that happens has to do with politics.

If we are the most illiterate country in the world today, it is because of politics. If our administration is cumbersome and inefficient, it is to do with politics. If we have dirt tracks where there should be four-lane highways, it is to do with politics. If we have no healthcare to speak of and a new Minister of Health who thinks that she was insulted by being offered such an insignificant portfolio, it is to do with politics. I could go on and on but then I would run out of my 850 words and would not be able to say goodbye.

What I have been trying to say throughout this piece, which is getting more maudlin by the minute, is that I broke the rules of political column writing and if I survived ten years it was because of you, dear readers, and because The Indian Express allowed me to break the rules. Not once was I ever prevented from writing what I felt like writing, not once did anyone urge me to lay off someone or tone down my criticism of a particular issue. It was this that made the column worth reading and worth writing. Alas, however, the time has come to move on. That’s life. You settle down into what you think is a happy, little groove and suddenly something happens and you find yourself pushed right out of it. Something of that kind happened to me and if you want to know more, look for me elsewhere.