Dad146;s not the way

Three case studies of fathers distancing themselves from their star sons

Srinivasa Rao- Sharath Kamal Table tennis

The day Srinivasa Rao, a reputed TT coach from YMIA, Chennai realised that he had stormed out of the room once too often after public outburts while young son Sharath Kamal erred, he handed over the reins to brother Muralidhar Rao. 8220;Once we figured out that Srinivasa8217;s reactions as father and coach were overlapping, we decided I8217;d take over,8217;8217; says Muralidhar Rao, who has since occupied the coach8217;s chair next to Sharath Kamal and younger sibling Rajath Kamal. 8220;Parents get very emotional about their kids8217; games. And they if they get very picky about the child8217;s technical aspects it creates trouble as even the kids are more touchy about criticism that comes from the parents,8221; says Srinivasa. For Sharath Kamal, currently India8217;s brightest hope on the table, his uncle8217;s level-mindedness during matches worked perfectly since it would pain him to watch his father frustrated, even though Rao Sr worked extensively with him during practice sessions. 8220;What a father says can affect a son tremendously. So when the time comes, you have to move away as a charge from your parent. But my father knew where to draw the line, otherwise I8217;d gotten really frustrated,8221; he says.

Krishna Bhupathi-Mahesh Bhupathi Tennis

Bhupathi Sr, who coached Indian tennis ace Mahesh in his early years is emphatic when saying, 8220;It is 100 per cent not advisable for a parent to keep coaching his children.8221; Bhupathi Sr who made way for a professional coach, once son Mahesh stepped into the big league says, 8220;I was lucky to share a good rapport with my son. But it gets very tough sometimes. We could train hard and break the ice the very next moment after stepping out of the court, but I was fortunate.8221; He also cites the example of Vijay Amritraj who allowed a coach to do the job while son Prakash was growing up without any interference, and stepped in only when the boy had matured and travelled enough.

Uday Pawar-Anand Pawar Badminton

Uday Pawar might be a regular feature on the sidelines whilst 20-year-old son Anand goes about finding his feet on the seniors circuit, but Pawar Sr insists he loosened his grip over the teenager five years ago. 8220;When he was 15-16, I told him to decide for himself on coaches. Even when I do coach him, we make it a point to leave the game on the court. It is never discussed at home, and if I have to talk shuttle with him, I take him out for a drive or a walk,8221; says Uday Pawar. 8220;We8217;ve realized it cannot be an ego thing, there has to be the basic understanding that whatever8217;s happening is for his good. So unless he is convinced he won8217;t make the alterations in his game. Also I8217;ve been sending him to train at Bangalore and even abroad, so that he is exposed to different coaching systems,8217;8217; Pawar adds, insisting that he will phase out his participation in the son8217;s career, but will always be available for him when he is needed.

8212;Shivani Naik