Lisa Ray says she ‘prioritised crying’ during cancer treatment; counsellor shares why doing so during trauma is important

Reflecting on her diagnosis, Ray admitted that her initial reaction was, unexpectedly, a sense of relief. The diagnosis gave her a reason to pause, step back, and reassess her life. “Finally, I can stop; I can get off this train,” she shared, expressing how the gravity of her illness forced her to slow down and confront her emotions. This pause ultimately helped her embrace vulnerability, reminding her—and others—that true strength often involves accepting and addressing one’s own emotional needs.

Reflecting on her statements, Dr Priyadarshini Deo, a counsellor at the Centre for Cancer and Palliative Care, Kokilaben Dhirubhai Ambani Hospital, Mumbai, says that trauma is any experience that disrupts a person’s ability to cope. Cancer trauma, in particular, can cause deep emotional and psychological distress. Healing, she explains, requires more than physical treatment; it demands time, self-awareness, and courage to confront difficult emotions. Techniques like cognitive behavioral therapy, medical hypnotherapy, and coping strategies are often employed to support mental well-being during and after cancer.

Dr Deo also underscores the importance of crying as an emotional outlet, helping to release sadness, anger, fear, and frustration. “Crying reduces stress hormones and provides a sense of relief, promoting a powerful form of healing that too often goes unrecognized.,” she says, further emphasising that self-care isn’t indulgent but essential; patients need to learn to set boundaries, nourish their bodies, and engage in activities that bring them peace.

Establishing a safe support circle is another cornerstone of the healing process. Surrounding oneself with people who offer validation, respect boundaries, and provide encouragement creates a vital network that fosters emotional safety. For some, this may mean distancing themselves from individuals who drain their energy or fail to understand their healing journey. Dr Deo notes, “Letting people go isn’t about resentment but protecting your peace.”

Dr Deo highlights that healing from trauma like cancer doesn’t follow a universal path. The process requires a mindset that embraces setbacks as part of growth, focusing on self-compassion and resilience. Empowering oneself through self-care, supportive relationships, and healthy boundaries fosters emotional growth. Cancer survivors can develop a deeper emotional intelligence by allowing themselves to cry and feel vulnerable, transforming their experiences into a foundation for a hopeful future.

This mindset also strengthens healthy boundaries, helping individuals avoid situations that may trigger further trauma. Prioritising positive, supportive relationships reduces isolation and helps individuals feel understood, allowing them to trust and connect with others.

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