‘Jaise kursi, table, takiya hai, waise aap pade ho’: Bhagyashree on struggling with self-doubt; how women can rebuild identity and self-worth amid life’s demands

She described feeling like her life had become stagnant and devoid of meaning beyond her household responsibilities. “Aapko lagta hai ki jaise kursi, table, takiya hai, waise aap pade ho…  aur aapki zindagi mein aur kuch nahi hai (You feel like you’re just there, like a chair, a table, or a pillow… and there’s nothing more to your life),” she said. 

The actor’s introspection highlights the emotional challenges many women, especially in India, face when navigating phases of self-doubt and loss of identity, especially when dedicating themselves entirely to family or other responsibilities.

So, what steps can they take to reconnect with themselves?

Neha Parashar, senior clinical psychologist at Cadabams Hospitals, Research and Rehabilitation Centre, tells indianexpress.com, “Feeling disconnected from oneself is often a result of unmet emotional needs or overwhelming external pressures. Writing down thoughts, fears, and emotions can help individuals untangle what they’re feeling and identify patterns contributing to self-doubt. Reconnecting with hobbies or activities that used to spark happiness can reignite a sense of purpose and individuality.”

 

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She adds that accomplishing even minor goals helps rebuild confidence. Breaking down long-term ambitions into smaller steps can make the journey feel less daunting and more rewarding. “Instead of berating oneself for perceived flaws, adopting a compassionate mindset is essential,” Parashar suggests. 

Professional counselling or support groups can also offer guidance and validation. Parashar highlights that therapists can help individuals explore unresolved insecurities, identify coping mechanisms, and work toward self-acceptance.

Balancing personal aspirations and household responsibilities to avoid losing sense of individuality

Parashar states that balancing personal goals with household responsibilities can be tough, especially with high societal or familial expectations. Prioritising time management, such as dedicating specific hours to personal projects, helps maintain focus. Delegating chores and sharing responsibilities fosters teamwork and frees up time for individual pursuits. Open communication about personal goals builds understanding and support within the family, reducing guilt or conflict. Integrating personal growth into family life — like family fitness activities or shared learning experiences — can align both priorities.

Effective ways to build self-esteem and self-worth after going through a period of feeling unproductive or insignificant

Rebuilding self-esteem after a low period requires deliberate focus on strengths and achievements. Reflecting on past successes, no matter how small, can remind individuals of their capabilities. Practicing affirmations like ‘I am worthy of love and success’ helps reframe negative self-perceptions. 

Parashar mentions, “Engaging in skill-building activities, such as learning something new, fosters growth and purpose. Surrounding oneself with positive influences reinforces self-worth, while gratitude practices like journaling shift attention to life’s positives. Additionally, regular exercise boosts mood and confidence, enhancing both mental and physical well-being.”