When SRK debunked the dream man myth built by Shah Rukh Khan

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You want a timeless romance that doesn’t fade even in the absence of your loved one, and prove to the world that love can happen anytime, and even the grandest of all daddies can’t do anything about it. He gave us Mohabbatein. You want an all-encompassing romance that burns you down from within, but leaves you with an epic feeling of having done the biggest sacrifice of them all? He gave us Devdas.

And if you wanted to top that sacrifice with a beautiful romance that is focused on keeping the love of his life happy even if he isn’t there to see that happiness? He gave us Kal Ho Naa Ho. You wanted an old school romance that allows you to be in solitude even when pining from the bottom of your heart waiting for the proverbial light at the end of a really dark tunnel? He gave us Veer Zaara. You wanted a practical romance that questions the idea of fidelity, and places personal happiness as an important part of romance even if it breaks marriages. He gave us Kabhi Alvidaa Naa Kehna.

Basically, throughout the 90s and 00s, Shah Rukh Khan sold 50 shades of romance to an easily influenced audience, who grew up wanting their partner to be like Rahul, Amarkant, Aryan, Aman, Veer, and Dev, among others. They wanted the men in their lives to be like Shah Rukh Khan. The man who could charm his way through any crowd, smile his way through any heart, and talk his way through any mind. 

Shah Rukh Khan is someone who not just sold the drug of romance, but also reminded people of the side effects. However, who even reads the fine print? So, here’s drawing parallels between two of his most blatant advertisements about how being the dream man is actually taxing, and the concept is more often than not, just a farce, an act… a myth. 

SRK — Surinder, Raj and Kishanlal — take centrestage 

In Paheli, when Lachchi (Rani Mukerji) enters wedlock, she is young with eyes full of dreams. She wants to have a marriage that would be everlasting and perennially happy. But there is a ghost who has fallen in love with her. When Kishanlal (Shah Rukh Khan) leaves home to take care of his family business leaving her alone in a new world, the ghost comes and takes over the place of her husband and becomes the man of her dreams. 

In Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, when Taani (Anushka Sharma) enters wedlock, she is young with eyes devoid of any dreams. She is in the marriage because the love of her life was snatched from her due to a cruel twist of fate. But Surinder (Shah Rukh Khan), her husband, has fallen in love with her right from the time he sets eyes on her. However, when Taani enters a dance competition to appease her individual needs and desires, Surinder takes a back seat and allows his alter ego of Raj Kapoor to take over and become the man of her dreams. 

Basically, through Paheli and Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, Shah Rukh Khan was saying two things — A dream man doesn’t exist — and he is either a ghost or a fraud. In fact, in a recent interview, Shah Rukh Khan said, “Paheli is about the right of women to choose what they want, and their right to live their life beautifully and wonderfully as everyone around does. But yeah, for a woman, the perfect man is just an illusion.” So, what if it is a ghost that gives her everything that she deserves and needs? So, what if it is a figment of imagination that manufactures attraction?

In many ways, it was fitting that Shah Rukh Khan was the one who decided to debunk the myth of the dream man. Unlike many of his contemporaries, he was a phenomenon that was built from the ground up. He was the face of the common man, who wanted to believe that the sky’s the limit. People believed that they could be him if they tried. However, in a decade or so, he transformed himself into the dream man that everyone wanted to have, and everyone wanted to be. But this time, it wasn’t the same. 

In Paheli, Lachchi is informed by the imposter that she has the right to choose. The paranormal entity gave her the freedom to choose. It was her decision to live the life she wanted with the ghost. But, when Surinder starts the farcical double life, he was actually robbing Taani off that freedom. It was more like the illusion of choice.

We see Taani happily accepting Surinder, but wouldn’t it prick her conscience that she wasn’t allowed to like him the way he was. Wouldn’t she constantly be thinking about how he knew she was ready to leave him? Just because all’s well that ends well, do we really not understand that Taani is forever in debt. Yes, Surinder might not hold it over her, but it is impossible for it to not weigh heavily in her mind.

So, once again, Shah Rukh Khan was saying that one can’t forever wear a mask, and it is better to be who we are. However, that also puts the onus on people to stop dreaming about having the perfect man in their lives.  

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For many, all that is left in their lives is the illusion of being with the perfect partner. Of course, they know reality paints a different picture, and are ready to live their lives with the Surinders, Raj Kapoors, and Kishanlals. But even if Shah Rukh Khan descends into each of their dreams and lets them know that the idea of the dream man is a myth, they would just look him straight in the eye, and say… “We know… But let us dream. Don’t take that away from us.”