Ah, the trials, the travails, the tribulations of taking on the Indian state. In my case, a mere municipality, and I have spent the past week running between lawyers and policemen to shield myself against the revenge of the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation (BMC). Somebody up there in the higher echelons of BMC did not like the piece I wrote in this space last week about my civil(civic?) disobedience over Julie’s toilet habits. For those of you who may not have read last week’s column, a quick summary. Julie and other well-bred dogs in the city of Mumbai have been banned from doing their business on Marine Drive unless their owners are prepared to clean up after them or pay a fine of Rs 500. I consider this unfair as long as the city’s 500,000 street dogs are allowed to do what they like and so refused to clean up or pay up. It is my considered opinion that if I as a citizen have duties then they should come after the municipal corporation does its duties by giving us a clean city with at least the basic amenities of the 21st century like clean water, modern sewerage systems and adequate housing. I pointed out that the BMC’s cleanliness drive should begin at home with a concerted effort to keep its own house clean. They are housed in a wonderful, old Raj building that has been ruined by filthy habits and criminal neglect. In this sequel to the saga that began with Julie’s inadvertent indiscretions on Marine Drive I want to tell you what happened after last week’s piece appeared. A couple of days went by peacefully. Julie went off to vacation by the sea and I took myself off to Delhi to explore the possibilities of a serious piece on our relations with Pakistan when the evening before my deadline, I received a call from a reporter in The Times of India. He told me that he had called because the BMC was planning to charge me with ‘pushing’ the officer who tried to fine me. Why would I do this, I asked, when as a veteran hack I was well aware of the consequences of obstructing an officer of the government whilst he was in pursuit of his duties? Even junior reporters know the consequences of this. Besides, if I was ‘pushing’ the official why would I have given him the number of my cell phone and explained that I was not paying till there was a proper system to dispose of dog shit. An adequate number of waste disposal bins, for a start. The more important point I made in last week’s piece was the need for elected city governments that would be responsible to citizens and not some state government. All the great cities of the world have elected governments headed by powerful Mayors, which is why they are cleaner and better-run than Indian cities. It is my belief that Indian cities are unplanned, unsanitary and among the ugliest in the world because municipal governance is seriously flawed. If it were not flawed would the BMC not be dealing with Mumbai’s more serious problems instead of concentrating manpower and other resources on a bit of cosmetic surgery on Marine Drive? Even if every well-bred dog is prevented from doing its business in the streets of Mumbai, it will still be a city of open drains, unkempt public buildings and parks that look like untended wastelands. In response to my column last week I received many an e-mail from high-minded citizens who lectured me on failing to do my duties as a citizen. Only a small handful agreed that something urgent needed to be done to improve the quality of municipal governance. That was the point of last week’s piece and it is the point I emphasise this week. To distract ourselves with a debate on whether well-bred dogs should be allowed to do their business on Marine Drive is to miss the point. I was hoping to start a debate on the desperate need for elected city governments that should be held accountable for everything to do with the city, from policing to waste disposal. Alas, I ended up starting a debate on the toilet habits of well-bred dogs. Can we get away from this and think seriously about the bigger picture? It is important that we do, or in the next couple of decades, when more than half of our population moves to urban centres our Bharat ‘mahaan’ is going to become the largest slum in the world. Meanwhile, who would like to join me in my campaign to demand that BMC do more for the city than make one street a dog-shit free zone?
