An out-of-court experience: Inside Delhi High Court’s mediation centre

Named Samadhan (solution), the DHCMC was set up in March 2006 to reduce pendency and costs incurred by the court in settling cases. Apart from marriage breakdowns, child visitation rights and property cases, the centre also handles commercial matters, issues related to intellectual property rights and labour disputes. A few criminal cases too land here, though never those involving heinous crimes.

Of late, there has been an uptick in the number of cases referred to the centre: from just 1,216 cases in 2021 to 2,016 between January and July this year. Besides settling nearly 25% of the 33,406 cases referred to it by the court as of February 2023, data shared by the centre for the past three years indicates that it has settled nearly as many cases that were not referred to it by the court, including those related to ongoing disputes and requests for pre-trial intervention by lawyers.

To keep up with the rising referral demand, the centre inducted 11 child counsellors in 2023, in addition to its existing 256 mediators. To work as a mediator at the centre, one is required to have a law degree and undergo specific training.

Justice Navin Chawla of the Delhi High Court, a member of the DHCMC Overseeing Committee that is responsible for framing the broader policy and guidelines for the centre’s functioning, tells The Indian Express, “The primary reason governing the court in child matters is child rights and that they are protected at all costs. The panel of psychologists was expanded because we felt that when we are referring so many matters to the mediation centre, there must be a dedicated panel of experts as well.”

Many recent Delhi High Court orders suggest that Justice Prathiba Singh, among other judges, often refers matters pertaining to feuding couples and child visitations to the DHCMC. She says, “Making the DHCMC a site for visitation has several reasons. There is no public gaze, there is a certain level of comfort and civility maintained when they know that there is an entire court machinery right next door. Additionally, supervised mediations help estranged parents behave well in front of their children. It has also been made family-friendly. Apart from child visitations, we have been able to make the DHCMC a neutral meeting ground in cases involving queer people.”

Between harsh words and tears

From 10 am onwards, accompanied by their lawyers and a mediator, the feuding parties sit across a table in one of the 14 mediation rooms at the centre. A single session can stretch on for hours, even late into the night at times.

Till the last draft of a settlement is drawn, after years of mediation, the sessions are either interspersed with harsh words, heated exchanges and accusations, or hugs, handshakes and, at times, tears of relief. However, mediation is considered a failure if the mediator’s report says so or the parties concerned insist on fighting it out in court.

Unlike a courtroom, where client-lawyer relationship is limited to the case, mediators frequently deal with tempers running high or parties blowing hot and cold. While commercial and civil disputes are resolved much faster, mediators say family disputes are often more prolonged.

Over time, the DHCMC has become a safe space for children whose parents are undergoing separation. Delhi High Court’s orders from 2018 show the centre has been its go-to choice as a neutral venue to facilitate meetings between children and their parents. At times, meetings are also organised between children and grandparents.

Back in the DHCMC’s lobby, the five-year-old runs amok, declaring, “Mujhe yeh peena hai (I want to drink this)”. Distracted by a phone call, the man hands his son a fizzy drink as they wait for the boy’s mother.

Anticipating the ensuing hunger pangs, the man — while juggling food packets, a tiffin, his son’s Spider-Man bag and his phone, which is tucked between his ear and shoulder — takes his boy aside, opens a brown paper bag and starts feeding him a samosa. The mother, who has custody of the boy’s younger sibling, arrives around 1 pm.

For the next two hours, she tries unsuccessfully to bond with the child. When the boy refuses to acknowledge her presence, she changes tack. “I promise that we both will take a trip to Paris. I will only go with you. Mamma is learning French only for our Paris trip,” she coos, hoping to catch the boy’s gaze.

As she tries to wrap her arms around the child, he shrinks away. “Mere laddoo, idhar dekho (My sweetheart, look at me),” she says.

Minutes later, the estranged couple start throwing accusations at each other: the father blames her for “beating” their son and calls her a “gold-digger”, while the mother calls him a “bigamist” and a “cheater”. The child looks on, his presence soon forgotten by his feuding parents.

Adjacent to the DHCMC lobby is a children’s room, which has toys, board games, books, and sheets with doodles and crayons, where a visitation is underway. The estranged couple, in their 30s, remain cordial. The father, who has the son’s custody, sips coffee as the trio play carom. Soon, a pizza box is opened, much to the eight-year-old boy’s delight.

The mother teases the son over a missed shot. With a slow grin, he manages to net a puck after three tries. He seals the win by fist bumping his mother and jumping off his seat, causing the father to break into a laugh. Instead of the mandated two hours, the visitation stretches to nearly four.

A mediator says, “When a marriage breaks down, parents often forget to prioritise the child over their hurt. It soon turns into a competition of who can do better for the child, often in materialistic terms…We had a couple where the mother was taking the child to the mall to buy him expensive toys, something the father did not have the means to do. In such cases, DHCMC serves well as a neutral ground.”

Priyanka, a child psychologist at the centre for the past 1.5 years, says “rebonding” the child with alienated parents is a key exercise undertaken by them.

“The techniques and responses vary. We start with building a rapport and then draw up a course of action based on the individual. Younger children, at times, run away during sessions. We take a break and try to reconvene, but we cannot force them if they don’t want to do a session. There may be cases where a parent is tutoring the child to behave in a particular manner. With older children, while their impulse control is better, they are also more aware of their parents’ situation.”

She says psychologists have sessions with both the child and parents, either individually or together. “For estranged parents, we recommend co-parenting since protracted rounds of litigation complicates the situation,” says Priyanka.

The final settlement deed

On another Saturday, after a two-year mediation process, a joint family is close to finalising the resolution of a business dispute. Moments before the family is called inside a meditation room, a lawyer tells some in the group, “It’s a process…you may not trust it, but you’ll have to keep hoping that it is resolved.”

After several drafts that never saw the light of day, a final settlement deed has now been drawn and nearly all family members have signed on the dotted line. As tears flow generously and people embrace each other, a young man touches his aunt’s feet, leaving her teary-eyed.

Just then, an agitated man exits a room where the first session in a civil dispute case is being mediated. Standing in the lobby, he proclaims to his lawyer, “Chor hai woh, chor. Fraud hai ek number ka (He is a thief and a fraud).”

“The mediation process is full of ups and downs. There will be anger, breakdowns, reconciliation… a whole gamut of emotions. For us, as well as the parties, the reward is the final settlement deed being drawn, indicating the success of the process,” says DHCMC organising secretary Veena Ralli, a mediator with 40 years of legal experience.

She is responsible for handling the daily affairs of the centre, including mapping mediation cases referred by the court to the appropriate mediators and child counsellors. She says she maps cases by gauging several indicators — age, address, socio-economic background and nature of dispute.

An estranged couple arrives at the centre with their two children, aged 8 and 10 years, and the maternal grandparents. A counsellor ushers the children into the playroom, where a furious colouring exercise begins.

The counsellor says the children live with their mother, but were initially extremely hostile towards the father and the centre’s staff. The counsellor says, “We have seen an improvement in the children during our bonding exercises. In the first few sessions, they would not open up and were resistant to participating in activities.”

The parents too have a brief session each with the counsellor. Ralli adds, “It is a conscious choice to schedule most child visitations on Saturdays since the courts are closed. It is less intimidating with fewer people on campus and fewer lawyers in their black coats.”