Asha Negi: Felt my career was over after two of my shows went off air in a couple of months

Here are excerpts from the conversation:

In a recent webinar, you mentioned that you feel you’ve evolved as an actor with Baarish. Does the realisation come naturally or people around you told you that you have improved?

Honestly, when you work with such talented actors, it really helps to better yourselves. Also, right now, we are getting to consume all kinds of content, and that also helps in bettering your craft. Personally, when I feel I am not improving, I don’t think I can carry on with the job. Even before I moved to acting, I tried a couple of jobs, which I finally quit because I didn’t see any growth. When I did get a break, I realised that what you watch sitting at home is all glamourous, but it requires so much more. I didn’t think I would survive, but then I started doing different things and fell in love with the profession. With each project, I need to grow as that’s my only motivation and inspiration.

How do you look back at your journey?

I have no regrets. I am actually grateful for all the failures and shortcomings. I don’t think I would have been this person, if I hadn’t gone through all of them, I am really thankful, as the experiences not only made me a better actor but also an evolved person.

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While most actors are ambitious and outgoing, you have kind of moved ahead at your own pace. What made you go slow and choose fewer projects?

I was actually always like that. After Pavitra Rishta happened, I did Nach Baliye and a couple of other reality shows, but I was desperate to get back to acting. And in a hurry I picked up Ek Mutthi Aasmaan (Zee TV), where I replaced the lead. It got shut in a month, and then I did another show (Kuch Toh Hai Tere Mere Darmiyaan, Star Plus), which again was a replacement. That too wrapped up in sometime. I was so demotivated and depressed, I felt my career was over. Even though you are not an insecure person, when you have people around you from the same fraternity doing well, it does pinch you. Not for them but for yourself. That’s why I decided to take a break, and pick the next project when I was completely sure. I did Khatron Ke Khiladi and a few hosting stints, and then Baarish happened. It was a beautiful project and here I am now, back in action (smiles).

You are also known to be quite a recluse?

In the past few years, I have actually become quite a loner. I don’t really like meeting too many people, and even when I go out for a big outing, I need a 10 day recharge afterwards. I have very few friends in the industry and just one from school. I am not very social, and cannot go out every night.

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But visibility is an important part in an actor’s life. Don’t you think you might have lost on opportunities for not being too social?

It might be possible. I too somewhere feel that it did hamper my growth. However, I can’t do it just for the sake of it. People would easily understand that I am faking it (laughs). My life’s ambition is to be happy, and I only strive for it. With social media, the pressure has increased on celebs to be out there so much. However, I am an actor, and am only happy when I do that.

You will be next seen in Anurag Basu’s Ludo. Do you think it would be a big step towards Bollywood?

I really can’t talk about it right now. If not for the lockdown, the trailer would have been out by now. Till the time the makers don’t make an official announcement, I really can’t say anything. However I am really excited for it, and it could be the needed stepping stone for me. I really wish to do great characters where I get a chance to perform. I don’t want to be just a heroine doing glam roles. I want to do important parts that people remember for a long time after watching a film. I would love to be a part of such projects.

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What do you want from your career in the next five-ten years?

I just want to do good work. Initially, people used to say that the digital medium is a bridge towards films. However, given the current situation, I think it will only become bigger in the coming time. I want to challenge myself, and leave behind a legacy of good work.

A lot has been said about issues in your personal life (breakup with Rithvik Dhanjani). How do you handle such crises when everything is in the public eye?

It does get really difficult and affects one mentally. I don’t want to get into any kind of details but it is a challenge. Having been part of the industry you do get used to these things, however your family is not. I come from a very simple family from Dehradun, and when you see them getting affected, it gets tough.

Baarish 2 is streaming on ALTBalaji and ZEE5.