Naseeruddin Shah says wife Ratna Pathak isn’t like ‘rasmalai’ all the time, reveals key to their long marriage

Naseer added, “But I believe our marriage has worked because neither of us had any fixed expectations from each other. We didn’t assign fixed roles for each other. Although I told her that I don’t know how to cook food immediately. But I offered to clean up and do the dishes. More or less, everything has been a surprise. And I kept discovering new things about her, new qualities. And I hope she has as well. But most importantly, we’ve maintained our friendship.”

He said that he has seen his entire family follow a patriarchal set-up, and that he never wanted to repeat the same mistake and behave as if he’s the ‘lord of the house’. ‘Khana lagao, paani laao (Give me food, bring me water)’, I never did all this, nor did I impose such a dynamic. We consult with each other about everything. I believe she is a more capable person than me,” he said, adding with a laugh, “I’m sure I can beat her in a physical fight, but I don’t need to test her skills, she’s very strong.”

Naseer and Ratna got married in 1982. They’ve previously spoken about the uphill battle that they had to face in convincing their parents about their bond, because Ratna’s folks didn’t think too highly of Naseer, who had been married previously, and Naseer’s father was against most of his life choices, which included becoming an actor.