Yum Yum Yoga?

I may be wrong but yoga is traditionally never taught to toddlers. Or dogs. Or cats. Neither is it performed for 8216;tighter bums and tums8217;

One of Mumbai8217;s finest yoga teachers is Father Joe Perreira, a catholic priest who has given thousands a glimpse of how our finite bodies can reach for the infinite.

So when two clergymen from Somerset, UK, recently banned a yoga instructor from using the Church premises for her 8216;un-Christian8217; classes, it was ironic but not surprising. Ironic because the essence of yoga is uncannily similar to Biblical theology. And not surprising because ever since Galileo had the temerity to suggest that the Earth revolves around the sun, the Church has always been suspicious of 8216;heathen8217; cults.

Of course, today yoga is more than a cult. It is a 30 billion dollar global phenomenon with an estimated 50 million converts from Beverly Hills to Beijing, and growing in inverse proportion to rapidly emptying Church pews in the Christian world. Presumably, this doesn8217;t exactly make it the Sunday sermon favourite in ecclesiastical circles.

Now, again, far from surprisingly 8212; Somerset8217;s divine fracas has been hijacked by yoga8217;s secular motherland. 8220;It is foolish to link yoga with any religion,8221; says Guru Baba Ramdev of the VHP, 8220;it is just a scientific tool to make the body and mind healthier.8221; I humbly beg to disagree with His Holiness, and 8212; again, ironically enough 8212; rest my case with the apex body of the Indian Catholic Church. 8220;Yoga is deeply rooted in Hindu tradition8221; retorts Father Babu Joseph, spokesperson of the Catholic Bishops Conference of India, 8220;it is not just physical exercise but sadhana too.8221;

I8217;m afraid he8217;s right. Yoga is nothing but sadhana or spiritual practice that unites body, mind and soul with seamless perfection. India needs to emphasise this, instead of getting seduced by its new body-beautiful branding. In fact, asana practice is only one 8216;limb8217; of yoga8217;s 8216;eightfold path8217; that also includes yama codes of conduct, niyama rules of life, pranayama breathing exercises, pratyahara inner silence, dharana concentration, dhyana meditation and samadhi ultimate attainment. Yes, all these are deeply rooted in Vedic philosophy, which, incidentally, happens to be a profoundly universal and catholic doctrine.

In addition, yoga is powerfully therapeutic. That is why it must be taught by qualified practitioners from accredited institutions. You can spend an entire lifetime being a student of yoga. Yet today, even in this country, 8216;instructors8217; are being churned out in three days at five-star 8216;retreats8217; 8212; mere novices who charge an arm and a leg for cavalier classes.

This is not just unethical, it is dangerous, because yogic practices like breathing and meditation are very potent and traditionally imparted only when the student has gained a certain degree of physical proficiency. Wrongly taught, yoga can cause serious injury, psychic disturbances and mental illness. Yet even classical yoga institutes are preferring catch-and-carry weight-loss, stress-relief and diabetes management 8216;packages8217; on popular demand.

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Unfortunately, this popularisation inevitably leads to vulgarisation. An example is Somerset8217;s banned 8220;Yum Yum Yoga8221; class for toddlers. Now I may be wrong but yoga is traditionally never taught to toddlers. Or dogs. Or cats. Neither, as far as I know, is it classically performed in the nude, for 8216;tighter bums and tums8217;, to hip-hop and rave, with disco and salsa, on a 560 Gucci yoga mat, or in 105 degrees fahrenheit, a la Bikram Choudhury, Hollywood8217;s Rolls Royce driving 8216;guru to the stars8217; who is attempting to patent his line of 8216;hot8217; yoga.

While most of these are harmless, I am not sure they really qualify as 8216;yoga8217;, at least, not the kind of yoga the Church need worry about. Nevertheless, the Indian government has finally sought to protect our 5,000 year old brand by cataloguing 1,500 poses for its traditional knowledge digital library. But this is as absurd as trying to copyright the Bhagwad Gita or the Bible! Yoga is India8217;s gift to humanity, one we have never successfully packaged or sold. Yet, we do need to ensure that our gift remains genuine.