I am.Seema Dasgupta, married for 22 years to Colonel Ashish Dasgupta, Commandant GREF Centre. We have two children - Anamika who is 21 and Abhishek who is 17.My day begins.With a morning walk of about 45 minutes, followed by tea with the whole family. After that, I sit down for my puja. Although I did not start out as a very religious person, over the years, I find that there has been a certain change in perception. I find the rituals inculcate a certain sense of discipline in me and also instill a sense of values and tradition in my children.After my puja, I give instructions to the cook for the day. My mother-in-law who lives with us, my husband who is quite a health freak and my son may have different preferences, so the idea is to make something which will suit each one. Occasionally when I have time I cook a few dishes too, but I have certain social duties which take me out quite often.We live in a large sprawling bungalow.You know how these old Army houses with a vast expanse of lawn and gardens can be. I am quite proud of my house and although I am not a very fussy person, a general regular cleaning to keep the house neat and tidy is a must.I love meeting people.I make friends very quickly and love to entertain. Besides, there has never been a time, where I have not had people coming over and staying with us. They may have come on posting and not yet been allotted a house or they may be passing through. I am not the sort of hostess who fusses over her guests. I treat them all as a part of the family and maintain a very informal atmosphere.I have always had a beautiful relationship with my in-laws.Especially with my father-in-law. He is no more now. Since he had three sons, he always treated me like the daughter he never had. We had our share of arguments too, but reconciliation was immediate. We would have our morning tea together, while the rest of the family was fast asleep. And at that time we would talk about everything under the sun. This would invariably lead to an argument, but it never took us long to patch up.Being the prefect partner.My husband leaves the running of the house completely to me. I do not need to consult him for any purchase I may wish to make. In fact, now that we are planning to buy a house and even that decision is left to me. My husband agrees with whatever I decide, because over the years he has learned to trust my instincts and judgements.I am a friend, confidante and guide of my children.My children confide in me. Even if they are going through some bad experiences, they know they can come to me without hesitation. Teenagers can make the wrong kind of friends and go through some experiences which can be traumatic for them . I feel it is very important for me to be there whenever they need me.I have opted to become a full-time home-maker.When my daughter started school, I took up a teaching job in the same school. But after that, my husband's postings were mostly to areas near the Line of Control, where there were absolutely no openings for a job, but in any case, my hands were too full then with both my children. At Udhampur, however, a certain lady who was teaching kids of pre-nursery , made some rather disparaging remarks about the capability of housewives. This goaded me and since I had a diploma in computers, I took charge of a computer academy there. I did a wonderful job there and my employers did not want to let me go. Later, I also taught at Aptech.But I opted to leave all this and concentrate on my house. I feel that whatever job you do must be done well and with pride. A housewife's job is a challenging one, all rolled into one. She is a teacher because she teaches her children, she is a manager because she manages the house and she is a Human Resource Development specialist because she manages her in-laws and all the inter-personal relationships in a household and keeps everyone happy. Besides, all other jobs are within a certain framework but a housewife's job has no boundaries.I am passionate about social work.Since my husband's work (with Border Roads) takes him to remote areas, I have stayed with him in those places and seen how the families mostly from remote, rural areas suffered during casualties. In case of the husband's death many of their wives received no support from home. As they were illiterate, there was very little we could do for them. Sometimes young wives, even from good families would come an ask for just a labourer's job because they had little children to feed and were not qualified to do anything else.It was then that I decided to devote my time and creative energies to do welfare work, with the idea that training in any form of work gives a woman self-confidence. Here in Pune too, I have started an Adult Training Programme at the GREF Centre, where they can opt for tailoring, typing or computer training according to their level of education. Besides this, I am also trying to bring in some health and hygiene education with the focus on cleanliness, literacy, birth control and immunisation.To make a house a homeThere must be excellent inter-personal relationship and a lot of laughter in the house. A happy carefree atmosphere is what I like, and I endeavour to have it in my home.
