‘She felt she didn’t get that one role she’d be remembered for’

Aapa was full of life. She had lots of courage and knew her own mind very well.

She yearned to have people around her. I remember she used to constantly urge me to come and visit her. She was always searching for a family. Whenever she used to meet someone and if she really liked the person, she would say: ‘‘You’re my bachcha’’.

Aapa enjoyed her stardom. She saw all the highs and the lows. There were the days when top stars used to drop in at her house and then when her career took a backseat, nobody came. She used to call and nobody would respond. This saddened her.

She was generally always in good spirits. Till a few years back, she used to go for regular walks at the Mahalaxmi racecourse. She missed company much more when she was bedridden. She used to scold me if she knew I was in Mumbai and hadn’t come to see her. She would call me and fire me by saying: ‘‘You’re stuck in that goddamned Versova and have no time for your aapa’’.

She never minced words. I remember once we had gone to Ajanta and Ellora. I was all set for a trek in my sneakers. Naturally aapa couldn’t join me since she could barely walk. I told her to travel in a palki. She didn’t like it. She declared: ‘‘I’m not sitting all alone in that thing. If I go in it, you’re coming with me.’’ So, I also joined her.

She used to regale me with tales of how it used to be in her days. She had a vast memory and her favourite line was ‘Pata hai, ek martaba sets pe kya hua tha’.

Though she enjoyed her work, she still craved for a good role, something that she could live with. She felt she didn’t get that one role that people will remember her for.

The last time I saw her was a few days back. She was in a coma. I held her hand but I don’t think I could reach her. She was a part of my life and I’m going to miss her deeply.

The only thing I’m glad for is that her backache is gone forever. She was really suffering from it. She used to call and tell me: ‘‘Deepti, it’s worse today’’.

At least, she won’t be in pain now.

(As told to Harneet Singh)